Chateau Heartiste

Women have a mental laundry list of traits they want in a man.  Unlike men, it is not so simple for them to see an attractive guy from across the room for a sum total of 1.5 seconds and immediately want to have sex with him, no questions asked.  They throw out hoops to jump through and head games to separate the worthy from the pretenders.  As sexual gatekeepers, women rely on this complex social interplay to assess a man’s rank and deny or grant him admission to her body.

A crucial part of seduction is role reversal.  You want to turn the tables on women and use their psyops against them.  A man can magnify his desirability simply by having standards beyond face, boobs, and bum.  It is intoxicating to a woman to be pursued by a man who will judge her for more than her looks.  That means sticking to a mental list of qualifications women must meet if they want to enjoy the pleasure of your company.  The trick is to pay it more than lip service; having standards means nothing if you don’t actually believe in them.

I know from experience and scientifically-valid astrological textbooks that certain character traits and behaviors are like signal flares of a drama-prone incompatible relationship.  If a girl jumps on top of a bar to dance for an appreciative audience on our first dateI know she will be a poor choice for a girlfriend but a great ride for a torrid fling.

To any girl I meet:  when I strike up a conversation with you this is what is going through the back of my head:

Don’t be that girl…

… who thinks diamonds are a better best friend than a dog

… who lost touch with her femininity

… who has given up on love

… who pretends she can play like a boy

… who flakes

… who knows what she wants a little too surely

… who is an attention whore

… who is practiced in the art of aloofness and indifference (that’s my job)

… who cannot handle teasing

… who has sexual hangups

… who cannot take a sincere compliment

… who has lost her joie de vivre

… who doesn’t understand that men and women complement, not compete with, each other

… who re-applies her make-up every 10 minutes

… with daddy issues

… who doesn’t at least reach for the check

… who likes being a trophy a little too much

… who reads between every line

… who curses and flips the bird a lot

… who uses too much trendy slang

… who will accept flirting from other men while we are out on a date

… who mugs for invisible cameras

… who is externally validated

This may seem like an exhaustive, impossibly unrealistic list, and for  most girls maybe it is, but compared to the list of demands I occasionally read on craigslist from the sorts of women who’d be happier in love if they paid for it, I don’t think I’m asking for much.

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In my experience there is a simple and steadfast rule that governs serial dating for men who play the field.  For every 12 women a man dates, 2 of those 12 will be hot by his standards, 8 will match him in attractiveness, and 2 will be below his standards.  (12 is the magic number since studies on the mathematics of love have shown that on average that is the number of partners a man or woman must date before finding ‘the one’.)

This rule applies to the average guy who is socially competent and reasonably comfortable around women and who has command of some basic game.  Men with crippling dating handicaps like having more than 1,000 life-hours logged on World of Warcraft should focus on dating one or two women of any caliber.

The 2/8/2 Rule is not a prescription for dating success, but an observation of the courtship patterns of most players.  The rule seems to describe a “stasis point” that men reach when they are actively dating around and have settled into a comfort zone where a balance is struck between hot sex and emotional stress.  Since the rule is fluid, any changes in the strength and consistency of a man’s game will move his ratios positively or negatively.

Ideally, you want a 12/0/0 ratio but that would require masterful game plus objectively high status.  It is a rare man indeed who manages a 0/0/12 ratio.  These types are the gammas who have dropped all standards in order to satisfy their indiscriminate sexual appetites.  You will find them at NAAFA mixers and retirement community bingo halls.  0/0/0 men are betas who refuse to budge on their impossibly high standards and instead find an outlet for their probable low sex drives in porn.

2/8/2 is comfortable for most men because it gives them the opportunity to stretch their boundaries a little while not stressing them out too much.  Since regular sex without stupendous effort with girls who pass their attractiveness threshold is the principle driving force of men, the bulk of their partners will be the kinds of women other people think are “right” for them.  Interestingly, while the game needed to close these mediocre women is unexceptional, the learning gained from being in a relationship with them is much more valuable than any time spent with very hot women.  This is because a man can go much deeper with a moderately attractive woman, pushing his game and relationship strategies in all sorts of new directions, without running the risk of her suddenly leaving.  A drop-dead gorgeous woman is apt to walk out on him at the slightest infraction of her emotional checklist.  His room for error is razor-thin.

This is not to say he should forego aiming high.  It is optimal to have put in the effort and bedded at least 2 high quality girls out of the 12 total — the kinds of girls that make other people say “what the hell is she doing with him?”  His game needs occasional shakeups like a bodybuilder needs a new eating regimen or a new exercise routine to bust out of a plateau.  Only girls whose beauty takes his game to the breaking point are capable of inspiring him to unimagined heights.  Any more than 2, though, and he will likely crumble under the pressure, retreating to the familiarity of porn and 3AM garbage time.  Bend the ego, don’t break it.

At the tail end, he’ll dumpster dive with a couple of fuglies.  As long as he’s quiet about it and wasted little effort chasing her, he can avoid a crisis of self-esteem.  Gaming unattractive girls is sometimes necessary to end dry spells.  Hapless beginners and insatiable male hos are the most common types of pursuers of the easy notch.  Be careful not to make it a habit.

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Für den fürsorglichen, sensiblen Mann, der vor nichts Halt macht, um die Gefühle des Mädchens zu schonen, das er fallen lassen möchte.

„Ich hoffe, wenn wir eines Tages Kinder haben, dass wir keine heiße Tochter haben, weil … woo! … weißt du, ich weiß nicht, wie ich mich beherrschen werde.“

Praxiserprobt. Motherfucker genehmigt.

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for the caring, sensitive man who stops at nothing to spare the feelings of the girl he wants to dump.

“I hope if we have kids one day we don’t have a hot daughter cause… woo!… you know, I don’t know how I’ll control myself.”

field tested.  motherfucker approved.

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