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A cat cafe opened in New York to great fanfare, and female lawyers (genus: lawyercunt) may be on the way out as a member of the human species.

The latter assertion gets a boost from ❤️science❤️ recently with a new study which found that stressed out women have a harder time getting pregnant.

Stressed out women have more difficulty getting pregnant than women with less stress, according to a new study this week in the journal Human Reproduction.

Although the relationship between stress and trouble getting pregnant has been hinted at before, it had never been scientifically proven before now. This new research marks the first time that scientists have found a direct link between stress and infertility. […]

In a study that followed more than 400 women just as they were starting to try to get pregnant, the researchers found that women with the highest levels of the stress indicator alpha-amylase in their saliva were 29% less likely to get pregnant than women with the lowest levels.

They also found that women with the highest levels of alpha-amylase were more than twice as likely to meet the clinical definition of infertility–meaning they did not get pregnant even after a full year of trying.

Law is a stressful field. Hopefully the hordes of unfeminine, ballcutting manjaws who streamed into law schools the past thirty years will see their genetic lineages go the way of the dinosaurs.

Thankfully, a barren womb isn’t necessarily an inactive womb! Lawyer chicks can still serve as great pump and dump adventures.

The researchers still do not understand exactly why stress affects a woman’s ability to become pregnant, but this study did rule out some possibilities. For example, they found women with high levels of alpha-amylase had the same amount of sex as some of their less-stressed counterparts. “It’s not that stressed out women have less intercourse,” she said.

They also found no correlation between high levels of alpha-amylase and ovulation problems.

One theory the researchers plan to explore in future studies is whether stress changes what Lynch called “the hormonal milieu” of the uterus in such a way that it becomes inhospitable to implantation.

The god of biomechanics doesn’t care how many degrees you have or which firm’s dick you suck if you haven’t fulfilled your prime directive as a woman.


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