…to a gay man scouting for a green card. For evidence, see this try-hard article and accompanying photos.
Dat gay face. He’s the one with the thousand cock stare.
She is totally his citizenship beard. They will make traditional love precisely once. He will need mass quantities of drugs to commence the act and fake his completion.
Her marriage is a hog and phony show to burnish her feminist cred. “See, a fat woman proud of her fatness can get married too! Take that, straight white masculine men with healthy libidos!”
Lindy West is a blowhard feminist. Not a colorful exaggeration. You can practically see her blowhole.
The Immensity lies,
I’ve dated [ed: black] men who relished me in private but refused to be seen with me on the street, or who told me, explicitly, that we had no serious future because they were afraid their friends would laugh at them.
shitthatneverhappened.txt. No man talks like this. If a loser dumpster dives to get his rocks off, he won’t deliver a confessional coda like this one to his fat fling. He’ll just stop texting and ghost. Shit that does happen to Lindy West: She falls for [ed: white] guys, they aren’t the least bit interested, she spins it as their fear of getting ribbed by their friends rather than their complete lack of physical attraction.
Fat pigs lie all the time to assuage their hammy egos. Feminist fat pigs with an internet bullhorn lie twice as much and ten times as desperately. The try-hard, butthurt, phonyfuck haggadocio drips like bacon grease from the mouth corners of the Lindy Wests of the world.
I’m surprised by the numbers of gullible “red pillers” who take fat women at their word when they oink about their nonexistent love lives with “studs” and “winners”. Look at Lindy’s “””wedding””” pics. The freak show rolled into town and the only one not getting the joke is Lindy.
Prediction: Lindy West will not get happier nor more emotionally secure as she settles into her marriage. That is because she will know what no one but her and gaycabanaboy know: A circus spectacle won’t save her from the lonely, loveless nights that are the fate of fat women married to effeminate men dreaming of somewhere and something else entirely.
PS The easy shiv: “Lindy + A Ham”. True that.
PPS Why do I come down hard on Lindy West and her ilk? Because they’re degenerate liars. And degenerate liars are bad business for believers in truthnbeauty.
Seems that women like this do these kind of things for attention because most people look the other way when she approaches. Perhaps best to not feed the beast
For real. A beast like that bodychecked me in a bar last week because I wasn’t paying attention to her. I weigh 200 lbs and it still sent me into a nearby table.
She probably thought all those plates you talk about spinning might have food on ’em.
lolz greg….that was funny. For an old fart…
I got yer “old fart” right here.
/Sipowicz crotch salute
His name’s Aham…hahah…..she married a-ham? Also, this guy took the mantra, “Go West young man” too literally.
A ham married to Aham.
Hog and phony show… gold, Jerry… gold!
Yeah, one reason I imagine alphas don’t often become comedians is because their comedy is much more cruel and would cause too many Hurt Feelings.
Standing on stage, making both men and women laugh til they cry, is alpha as fukkk.
“”Standing on stage, making both men and women laugh til they cry, is alpha as fukkk.””
Gay. Telling a Western faggot millennial he/she has food inbetween it’s teeth is enough to make it cry so your point is moot.
Not so much alpha as hell, rather, an alternative survival strategy around men who are bigger and meaner… court jester gains favor of the king, that sort of thing.
From the article: “I am interested in expanding the realm of self-expression for fat people.”
SOMETHING’S expanding.
If all these fat chicks don’t stop self-expressing, the only thing people need be interested in expanding is our nation’s Lebensraum.
This guy’s name is like polymorphic mockery.
“Aham…hahah…..she married a-ham?”
I thought the same thing. Like, what would you have given to put smidge more space between the A and H on the streamers?
The drop cap to start the article is -perfect-.
i read the guy’s name as ‘ahab’ at first
Droll.
Well, he did get his white whale.
If only she had worn white. HA!–fat chance!
[…] Lindy “Immense” West Got Married… […]
“Fat pigs lie all the time to assuage their hammy egos.”
This.
It is, in fact, the psychological bedrock of obesity, established in top medical studies. When asked to keep careful diaries of food intake, the obese catalogue every fat-free yoghurt and every kale smoothie. They just neglect to add the half-gallon of ice-cream and giant bag of potato chips consumed just before bedtime.
Remind us of anything?
‘Well, Joey doesn’t count ‘cuz he only did me in the ass. And that train doesn’t count ‘cuz I was drunk.’
Female psyche 101.
“Hog and Phony Show” is an all-timer. Well done.
I generally hate mocking people’s looks but Lindy has it coming mostly for thinking we’re gullible enough to believe this charade.
“Thinking we’re gullible enough to believe this charade”
I think it’s to fool herself just as much as, if not more than, to fool us. These people are insane
I just come here for the puns.
The vows began:
“Lindy, do you take a Ham, forsaking all butters?”
[CH: a gorgonian knot.]
Gordian knot doesn’t even need to be altered here.
You mean Gorditan knot?
I think he’s making a pun about gorgons… i.e., hideous women.
I know, but her being Gorda….
She has two hams already. I’m a bit stumped as to why she wants a third.
[…] Lindy “Immense” West Got Married… […]
The guardian is a shit piece of tabloid that only Green Party flower fairy communists read.
I think the big corps are starting to wake up to the fact that they can’t keep women with shit-performance ratings in the top leadership jobs, just because their “womAn”
This phase of immersive diversification will pass, in time, and it will return back to how it was, especially when it effects sales and profits of tycoons – the statistics never lie
For all those feminist who think they’re winning the war. Form is temporary, class is permanent
Lol at all the diet pill ads on the article.
Also, lol at “I got my period”, already coming up with a cover story for the sexless wedding night.
Typical female logic: No one will know if they consummated the marriage or not unless they were in the room with them. So why bring up the period in the first place?
good catch
“I got my period; it poured after a month of uninterrupted sunshine”
Lol at first I thought she was describing her period, not the weather.
“immenstrual cycle”
Best… thread… eva!
Oh yeah. Ripping lindy = popping bubble-pack for the soul.
jeezus, she could tuck his entire faggy plaid suit AND bow tie under her FUPA.
and notice in the article she mentions absolutely nothing about her husband, she just keeps talking about her fatness.
she is captain aham’s white whale as well as her own.
Remember the true story of Terry McMillan, the author of farcical ‘Stella Got Her Groove Back’. As soon the Jamaican younger guy she married got his green card, he announced that he was a homo, then divorced her to shack up with his boyfriend and sued McMillan for spousal support.
I willing to bet that Lindy’s ahem, “marriage” ends up the say way.
How Lindy Got Her Gravy Back
Yet another downside to being straight. It’s funny because I keep telling my friends we’d all so benefit by being gay, but we have to like girls. If I was American, I’d marry a friend just for the tax benefits. Because fuck modern marriage. lol
Having a spouse that will help you get laid by girls instead of sabotaging it too… Since most marriages are sexless these days, mine wouldn’t stand out either. Weird enough, I’d rather trust a friend not to screw me over in a division of assets situation compared to a girl.
Fuglys and fatties: “Im sick of all the game playing on here!!! Im looking for a long term relationship with a real man!”
Men: ***crickets***
I prefer to use chiggers on the sheets of fuglies. It’s an itch I love to scratch.
“Fat pigs lie all the time to assuage their hammy egos.”
First and most major lie of them all: “I don’t eat that much, it’s genetics.”
Check out the BBC show Secret Eaters for how calories can really sneak up on those who lack self-awareness.
And they usually drink 4 liters of Diet Coke per day. Apparently they don’t have the internet or netflix, or they are illiterate.
… sigh … hangs head …
You’re right about thelie in the way it’s framed as something that “can’t be controlled” I.e. Genetics
But there are scientifically proven body types:
Ecto (skinny – resistant to gaining weight, fast metabolism)
Meso (muscle, best of both)
Endo (fat – slow metabolism, gains weight easy, big bone structure, naturally more hungry)
But of course, that isn’t an excuse for fat pigs to justify it, because we can all choose to look better – gym, diet etc
#beachbodyready
I’m an ecto/meso – training to look like a meso
I’m an ecto, so luckily I’ve always been skinny fat at my heaviest. But still, if you want to look good you have to change your diet no matter what.
One of the biggest eye openers for me when I began working out was when I downloaded a nutrition/food diary app. I didn’t eat heavily throughout the day, but a lot of the stuff I ate was high in carbs and calories. So I could have moderate sized meals 3 times a day and a snack at night and be way over my needed calories for the day. One way calories sneak up on people is through soda and juice – You don’t think that something so light can make you gain weight, but 8 oz. of Coke is still 110 calories, 31g of carbs, and 30g of sugar. This is particularly dangerous with women, who are generally smaller and require less calories, so something as small as a soda or beer can do a lot of damage.
@ng85, yep. For a (would be) 120 pound woman, 30g of sugar is 100% of daily max — that’s one soda, and the fatties get about 300g a day through their Starjewfucks 12″ tall cups of sugar-coffee and/or sodas or other sugary beverages.
Ever notice how the “% of daily max” figure is not printed on food labels? Check it out.
“Gone West” used to be a euphemism for death.
Going West in this circumstance is a fate worse than death.
I think you mean gone south…
And if you want a fate far worse than death, try going south on West.
Back in the 1800’s, when someone moved out West, it was generally assumed you’d never see them again.
I thought the great Manifest Destiny cry for opportunity was “Go West, young man, go West!”
But to this day, we still say something “went south” (i.e. downward) for things that went awry or deteriorated.
I’d rather go North by Northwest, personally.
Eva Marie Saint in her prime…
I’ll grant you that.
In the UK it’s “gone West”.
I think they may well stick together, if gravity has anything to do with it. She must be close to the Chandrasekhar Limit.
“I think they may well stick together, if GRAVY has anything to do with it.”
There, FIFY.
It causes me immense Schadenfreude to see these disgusting creatures faking what they will never have, namely true happiness and a fulfilling life.
As for the photo, they truly deserve each other.
so in other words, she is making herself out to be in some kind of disadvantaged group that is overcoming the evil and ignorance of the day by saying men don’t want to be judged for being with her. I guess that is one way of dealing with the psychological stress of being fat, you simply re-cast yourself as being a part of all the other disadvantaged peoples of the world, oppressed by white men.
that is one way of dealing with the psychological stress of being fat, you simply re-cast yourself as being a part of all the other disadvantaged peoples of the world, oppressed by white men.
In a nutshell… but you forgot “self-styled” in front of “disadvantaged”…
… or should I say “self-imposed”?
The original intro went:
“Nut, meet Fruit. Fruit, Nut.”
Surrounded, no doubt, by a bowlful of flakes.
They’re Grrrrreat!
*You can practically see her blowhole.*
Drutherknottankubellymutch.
Gay face? Hell, that suit gave it away.
sure chubby chasers are real, but that suit is so gay, the only thing gayer would be a damn rainbow suit.
[CH: yes, fatty fuckers exist, (mostly weirdos and black men), but tragically for the fatties there aren’t nearly enough fatty fuckers to go around and relieve them of their loneliness… or self-delusions of attractiveness.]
Doesn’t this mean that for the small percentage of White men who genuinely prefer fatter women, in in the face of other options, they can basically have harems?
[CH: as long as they don’t suffocate under the sheer tonnage.]
Maybe they do have a sound reproductive strategy.
[nope. fat women have increased fertility problems. and r-selection isn’t the white man’s game. quality is job one.]
Instead of fighting for the small percentage of beautiful alpha females, like most other White men do, they just sleep with many fat women.
[most prime nubility girls (18-25) are bangable to the majority of men, as long as they stay within the optimal 17-22 BMI range. note: “bangable” does not necessarily mean “commit-able”.]
Some men choose quality, others choose quantity.
[correction: most men, if given a choice, choose quality well before quantity. anyhow, what’s the benefit of quantity when, piled up, amounts to a shit mountain?]
Only the top alpha men get to have both and I won’t blame non-alpha men for making a choice.
[you have a child’s, or a bitter feminist troll’s, understanding of the sexual market.]
SC, so if only alpha males eat filet mignon, logically the rest should foresake chicken breasts and skip straight to all-you-can-eat rancid fish?
What girls need to realize about guys who fuck fat girls is this: they don’t actually *prefer* fat women, they just have low standards.
Hubby may not be queer…
… but he’ll do until queer gets here.
Don’t knock dumpster diving. I fed my fambly for 5 years by snagging food from dumpsters. We ate like kings.
Why on earth would you marry a homo if you’re a woman?
Fashion advice?
A true self-respecting homo would tell her that the only suitable look for her is an apple in her mouth.
Yeah, but any self-respecting apple would balk.
Because homos are willing to stick it in disgusting holes, and she apparently couldn’t find a black man who’d marry her.
Oops, the husband’s full name is Ahamefule Oluo… so he is a black man after all.
Black and homo. Heh.
Ahamefule, pronounced, “I’m a fool.”
“He will need mass quantities of drugs to commence the act and fake his completion.”
That makes two of us.
Or an ocean of red wine. Sorry…wrong thread.
Droll.
She’s so immense, she has tiny Lindy Wests orbiting her.
When she danced at the wedding, she caused the compact disc to skip…
… at the radio station.
Keep ’em coming, GE. You’ve been on fire!
When she danced at the wedding, her high heels turned into flip-flops.
Wedding photos courtesy of the Hubble telescope.
She didn’t have to come to the wedding. She was already there.
You fuckers. 😆
Her shadow once killed a dog.
Her belt size isn’t in inches… it’s in degrees of longitude.
She puts on her belt with a boomerang.
Every time she turns around, it’s her birthday.
Before the wedding she was seen ironing her dress…
… in the driveway.
I got a million of ’em… but WordPress keeps eatin’ ’em faster than Lindey at the all-night buffet.
As a wedding present, the Postmaster General awarded her her own zip code.
Sometimes she sits around the house. Literally.
One time she got stuck between McD’s Golden Arches and they had to grease up her thighs and coax her through with a Twinkie.
That’s why when the judge yelled “order in the court!”, she said “jumbo burger and fries please.”
When she wore the blue dress, people thought the sky is falling.
Christo went into hock attempting her as a subject.
When you see her ass in the door, don’t bother. She left five minutes ago.
They changed all the signs on the One Way streets in her town to No Way.
But when she pulls on her BVDs, they stretch to say “BOULEVARD”.
Her talking scale keeps repeating: “One at a time, please.”
If you’re in an elevator and she approaches, you’d better be going down.
lindy has written repeatedly about her boyfriend, now husband. this article immediately came to my mind: http://jezebel.com/why-the-hell-are-on-screen-interracial-relationships-st-1286456147. she is obviously full of try-hard insecurity, but it REALLY shines through in said article. and, there’s no
choice quotes:
I’m in an interracial relationship (or, as I like to call it…a relationship) with a man who is the product of an interracial relationship. My parents are both white. My boyfriend is half white and half Nigerian (it seemed too perfect not to include that video of him, above, making one of my favorite points ever about interracial relationships in advertising). We live in one of the most diverse zip codes in the country. Mostly, our life is mundane. When we get looks on the street, which we sometimes do, I suspect it has less to do with our skin color than with the fact that I’m fat and he’s a conventionally attractive mega-hunk (#braggin).*
*Not that I personally subscribe to the “conventional attractiveness” paradigm (I’ve dated dudes who looked every which way), but a lot of people do—and holy shit are we ever a foreign concept to them. It’s incredible how many women (fans of mine, sometimes) hit on my boyfriend right in front of me, like they could just “have” him and he would be grateful and it would be the proper thing to do to correct the balance of the universe. They’re only slightly worse than the people who assume we’re together because of some fetish. You guys. Maybe we just find each other attractive because we are both awesome.
also, “aham” is a total fucking faggot who could not be more deserving of the wildebeest that is lindy west. to wit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=54&v=zR1ultzSkOE
He looks gay and mildly retarded. That has to explain it.
Take him to the zoo. I hear retards like the zoo.
He’s not retarded… he’s just shy.
He tried out for the zoo and got a rejection slip – hence #wedding bells
Alas, yet another Rocky reference fallen flat!
“The strongest conflict I navigate is the one between feminism and the capitalism that is so deeply interwoven into weddings.” said no hot girl ever.
Mother of Pearl.
If you threw a rock at her face it would go into a Low Gut Orbit
rofl
from her article “Well, I don’t hide any more in my everyday life, and I definitely wasn’t going to hide at my wedding.”
well she CAN’T hide anymore…
That’s her wedding dress? I thought it was a Piñata cosplay.
CH,
Too bad you’re not on Twitter. The word ‘cuckservative’ is going fucking viral:
http://www.radixjournal.com/blog/2015/7/16/cuckservative-a-definition
You have DC Beltway fags tweeting “What’s a Cuckservative? Someone just called me that.”
Funny shit
[CH: le chateau can be struck down, but his works will return stronger than before.]
Part of CH’s dastardly plan to take over the world.
More cuckservative traits: adopting turd worlders, worshipping Israel, and not criticizing legal immigration levels.
Like Michael Savage put it: “Language, borders, and culture.” Wake up white man indeed.
Popehat all upset:
A glance down the rodent hole of people who use “cuckservative” seriously. Wow, they really hate my family. https://t.co/lUwvCx8uV6
— Popehat (@Popehat) July 22, 2015
Might be pissed at you, CH, since the adoption / race-cuking is link to you in article
Who dafuq iz popehat lolz
At this point “Conservative” simply means “Late to the (Progressive) party”.
Pretty much anyone younger than a baby boomer who thinks the charade is real.
Cuckservative is a social.construct lolz
“feminist… fat… feminist… fat… feminist… fat… feminist… fat… feminist… fat… feminist… fat… feminist… ”
I see, someone REALLY doesn’t want to be allowed back on the twitter.
[CH: do you think a CH house lord would beg a porky loser like Randi Lee Harper for re-entrance to the club she is inexplicably charged with monitoring? no, that is not how this will go. she will come to CH, on her knees, to offer an obsequious reconciliation to her betters. as losers are meant to do.]
Twatter rape!
“beauty is a fraught concept”
No… no it is not. It’s as eternal and solid as gravity.
Nice
Damn
CH, how come you don’t call her Triple Lindy? HAHA…yeah, it would be an insult to that fine film.
The Triple Lindy involves movement and the burning of a calorie or two.
What women are horny for sex? I do not think the older ones as they have all kinds of physical issues. Probably the young sluts.
some women stay horny all their lives. it’s in their nature. but yes, it is true that most do not.
I know a lady like that… God bless her.
Women are opportunistic when it comes to arousal. If a hot guy pings their labiadar (ht to somebody), their emotions will soften with anticipation of fiery libidinous upsurges.
Men initiate and women respond, typically, when it comes to sex. Men’s libidos are on all the time and women have the potential of a spike in libido all the time. Obviously, NAWALT and NAMALT.
Mrs. Gamer is post-meno and she is all hands around me. Married 30+ years. Mrs. Gamer used to claim physical issues 5 years ago. Not anymore. We rarely use lubricant. Little or no foreplay. This is probably a common experience for greater betas.
[CH: synthetic vaginal lubricant is the tribute ice queens pay to their beta hubbies.]
Swinella Wantafellas prevaricate continually to assuage their hyperlipidinous egos.
Use a more rudimentary parlance so as to eschew obfuscation.
Saywot?
And I’ll chew all the obfuscation I want, tyvm.
We are at war with the poz.
This is her husband’s, Ahamefule Oluo, attempt at standup comedy. Note the masked lisp. (His name almost sounds like “I am a fool-ay”)
On homophobia:
On race(still referring to buttsex):
More race stuff(Note the excessive jazzy hands):
[CH: yep he’s a fag.]
Damn, I’d hit that right quick!
Is this your neighbor? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Ml2QhiR3bo
Why is it that fat feminists who complain about fat shaming…never want to date fat men? They complain about fat shaming, and that they can’t get..skinny guys?
How is it that no one has ever picked up on this irony before?
projection comes full circle.
I bet Lindy is the one whose gonna be diddling the bean listening to tales about her husband banging Paolo.
Heh, heh… pork n’ beans.
Wha, did Leslie West pull a Jenner on us?
A “hog” is a male pig. She looks like a sow, but her forever barren womb makes her a gilt.
And functionally he’s a barrow, so it all amounts to the same thing.
I thought a boar was a male pig, and that “hog” is the more formal term for “pig”.
[…] Source: Heartiste […]
Christ they look like they arrived in a clown car but even one of those ones that fits infinite clowns wouldn’t have room for her.
I hereby decree that all Lindy West and generally ugly feminist chick articles include a video of this chick at the bottom:
https://heartiste.wordpress.com/2015/07/21/the-incidental-squirt/#comment-687957
I almost threw up my lunch stumbling onto this Lindy pic after getting blindsided with that Simpsons overbite cuckold hoax chick’s pic…Tyson couldn’t set up a more brutal 1-2 combo. Show some mercy on us, CH.
What’s ironic is that Lindy West could have been an attractive woman if she didn’t prefer being feminist swine. Her facial structure(beneath all the lard), eyes and hair or her skin aren’t bad. I’d probably bang 10 years younger West if she weighed a third of her weight, grew her hair and the like. Oh, and if she knew how to dress.
But aside from that, Jackie, how did you like Dallas?
Truly epic comments on this post!
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/plus-sized-beauty-blogger-explains-why-5968769
this is just awful
Lolz her marriage is a complete joke
Offered for your evisceration, Jessica Valenti’s latest hamsterbation.
http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/jul/20/catcall-culture-feminism-jessica-valenti
How can a man fuck this thing? I could not keep an erection.
Blocked by the beached whale is a banner that says, “Faggy+aHam” “Faggy+aPig” just wouldn’t roll of the tongue as well.
Oh jeez, you can see the anxiety written all over the guests’ faces. They all realized her hubby was a homo and all of them were internally agonizing over whether or not to tell her.
What a load of bull.its okay to not be perfect. once YOU start believing you look good, others will follow. be confident. be real. be you.NEVER let others dictate your happiness. if you’re happy, NOBODY can bring you down. don’t give anyone that power!
There is beauty in all shapes and sizes.
YOUR BODY IS BEAUTIFUL!!!
[CH: heh. nice parody.]
She never said she dated Black men. Y’all have to hold that L. Heartiste hold another L for throwing that in there LoL