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Category Archive for 'Sluts'

Welcome to the New Whore Order . The author of a controversial new book says she was so desperate for a baby she got pregnant ‘accidentally on purpose’ in a one-night stand. KATE SPICER admits that – like many women – she’s played the same dangerous game… Three weeks ago, I bought a pregnancy test. […]

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Contraption

I didn’t bother unhooking her bra. I never do anymore. I pulled it off her like a t-shirt. As I’m squeezing her boobs (and taking a mental note of her remaining “years-to-sag” based on a complicated formula I devised involving underside crease length, armpit spillover when prone, and depth of press), I glance over at […]

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I got a lot of trackbacks to my post on identifying sluts , and I was able to read the comments from a few of the links. This one was from a Facebook discussion forum: It’s fun sometimes to listen to people talk, because they’ll broach the subject of slut. I’ll ask them whats their […]

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Maxim #77: Women will screech louder the closer your words get to damaging or exposing vulnerabilities in their sexual market value. Based on the above maxim (and as amply demonstrated by the recent histrionic howling of the jezguzzling automatards shrieking on cue when confronted with my disconcerting words of truth), the top three soulkilling disses, […]

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It’s Easy To Identify A Slut

Women seem to think that men are too thickheaded and inattentive to identify which of them are cockgobbling cumguzzling sluts. Or they prefer to believe their sly poses of innocence and white lies are good enough to keep men in the dark about their sexual histories. They would be wrong. The dirty little secret is […]

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Thought Experiments

Thought Experiment #1 All else equal, which girl is more likely to get pumped and dumped?: a. an “adventurous” girl who played musical chairs with the mouths of five guys in a bar one night and banged a local emo rocker in the coatroom an hour after they met. b. a virgin. Thought Experiment #2 […]

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Previously, I awarded BOTY to the man who petitioned the state to change his last name so he could take his wife’s maiden name in marriage. It’s difficult to write while choking back vomit, but I managed to tough out my nausea and bring his story to the readers in hopes that I could save […]

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You Are NOT The Father

I was vegging out watching the cultural phenomenon that is Maury Povich’s Who’s The Daddy? specials. I can do this because I delegate all my work to underlings. This particular show was a treat — Maury had on girls who had been on previous Daddy shows and still hadn’t found the real daddy of their […]

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A while back, I was sitting in my favorite bar savoring a delicious bison burger and a beer which I imagined was the best beer in the world because it had a long German name. It was a slow Sunday afternoon and the bar was nearly empty. Across the bar, about fifteen feet away, a […]

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