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The Starbuckwheat

The Starbuckwheat is the term for the numinously accessible black mascot adopted by 115 IQ SWPL shitlib sanctimony-addict Whites who want to prove their moral righteousness to wine party circuit peers. Anon at Sailer’s uncorks a portmanteau with accompanying etymology that is so causticly readable and insightful it deserves a reposting here at the Chateau. In his example, the Starbuckwheat du jour assuaging shitlib egos is Ta Nigisi Coates.

With the ebbing of religion, Negro Worship became the new faith in America, esp among White Libs. It’s tied to MLK as the new founding father, the new messiah, the new christ, new martyr.

Blacks are seen as holy because they not only suffered slavery and discrimination but can sing & dance and do sports.

So, Negroes are supposed to be the Moral Arbiters of America. Whites are supposed to save and protect (instead of exploiting) black bodies so that blacks can save white souls.

Blacks bodies are supposedly impoverished because whites treated blacks badly. But because whites gained so much by robbing blacks, their souls have become sick and diseased. So, the New Race Deal (maybe should be called New Steal) is about whites healing black bodies and blacks saving white souls.

And MLK seemed to be that great leader. In a way, his death made the Negro-as-Saint bigger than ever. Turned into martyr, he could be worshiped like a god. If he’d lived on, he’d been just another Jesse Jackson.

So, there is this constant search for the Great Black Hope. The one who might live up to the white dream of Negro as Moral Redeemer. But too many blacks are into crime, ugly rap, corruption, or dementia. And stuff like BLM turns invariably into Trash Talk and violence.

Since blacks on their own are incapable of putting forth the Great Black Hope, white Libs must nurture and create them in their own Laboratory. The Lib-Lab. And Obama was a graduate from the Lib-Lab. His formative influences were hardly black. And even though The Nasty Coates grew up among Negroes, he found sanctuary among Nice White Folks who could channel his obligatory rage into pseudo-intellectual & pseudo-inspirational rhetoric. He is to social theory what Neil Degrassie Tyson is to science. A mascot for white Libs to show that they are into Diversity and the Great Black Hope. White Libs (and even White Cons) get high from over-praising blacks. (Thomas Sowell is smart guy but Paul Johnson praising him as the greatest thinker is just goofy.)

Because of the Negro’s role in the American Imagination, every era needs its
Negro Laureate.

It’s like white feminists were esp taken with Alice Walker’s COLOR PURPLE.

Also, The Nasty Coates looks like a turtle without a shell, a perpetually lost child in need of milk and cookies and kindness of strangers. He is Arnold for the intellectual class.

Also, there is something strangely satisfying about watching a Negro succeed in intellectual field. Though whites once resisted the rise of black athletes, it’s now long been established that blacks are good at sports and dancing and physical stuff. So, there is hardly any moral excitement in championing the black athlete. Ali was the last one to ride on that wave because it was the Civil Rights Era. So, his victory had racial overtones. There is still some of that when blacks make inroads into sports that tend not to be very black. Like tennis and golf and gymnastics. And of course swimming and winter sports, those associated with white privilege and culture of exclusion. Even so, it’s hardly surprising that blacks, if given the chance, would do well in something like tennis.
In some ways, there is a kind of subtle ‘racism’ in praising black success in sports. Some may see it as stereotyping blacks as BODIES who are more adept at brawn than brain. So, even as black success in sports is seen as triumph over ‘racism’, it is also felt as a kind of ‘racism’ since it stereotypes blacks as akin to beasts who can run and jump.

So, it is more surprising and satisfying to see blacks do well in brainy fields in which they’ve lagged behind other races. This goes against stereotype. It also means that blacks as thinkers are less threatening than blacks as fighters or athletes or thugs. But the problem with praising blacks-as-thinkers is it makes them less authentic. It robs them of their black essence that is closely associated with the thug, street hustler, musician, athlete, or big personality. It could be construed as whites trying to force ‘whiteness’ on blacks. This is why white Libs feel uncomfortable around black conservatives. Why, they are ‘uncle toms’, and white Libs don’t want that.
They want the non-threatening Negro but who retains his authenticity and this means Race & Rage. But for this Authentic Rage to be acceptable among white Libs, it must be articulated in less threatening manner. And the ‘genius’ of The Nasty Coates is he has concocted an intellectual coffee-grinder that turns his blackness into something more Starbucky. He is Starbuckwheat.

That wasn’t a shiv, that was a thresher to the shitlib id.

There are some phaggy male-things on liberal news outlets like NPR (Negro-mascot Purification Ritual) who virtue signal so hard when they have Starbuckwheats on their shows that their voices slip into a whisper and crack with welling emotion like a single tear is about to stain their soycheek.


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