Her: I have to tell you something.
Me: Oh man, here we go. What?
Her: It’s going to make me look bad. I’ll understand if you hate me after this.
Me: You’re a child molester?
Her: I’m married.
Me: [thinking about the last girl who forgot to mention she was married] Fucking great. Really?
Her: Yes, really. I’m a bad person.
*****************
Her: Would you like to do me in the ass?
Me: It’s funny how you ask so matter-of-factly. But, yeah, sure.
Her: Ow ow ow ow. Eeee.
*****************
Question for the studio audience: In what order did these two conversations happen?
This holiday season, we should all take time to remember that women
- have little sense of justice.
- perfected the art of amorality.
- like to be choked.
Merry Christmas!
[crypto-donation-box]
