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Bad Date

This post is also available in: German

How a man and woman describe the same bad date.

Man

she kept talking about herself… she talked about the most boring shit… when she blabbed about her ex i tried to change the subject… her left tit was smaller… her breath stank… her ass was kinda flat… i put my arm around her waist to check for rolls and she’s got a little muffin top… she turned her face at the last second when i went for the kiss, i hate when a chick plays coy… i just want to bang her and get it out of the way, then we can get to know each other…

Woman

he kept talking about himself… he wasn’t listening to me at all… he kept interrupting me when i asked about his dating history, god he’s got so much baggage!… he was staring at my boobs… his shoes were scuffed… i caught him checking out my ass, he was so obvious… he got too touchy-feely when he put his arm around me… he tried to kiss me and i could see it coming a mile away, his timing is so bad… i just want to get to know a guy before i sleep with him…

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