There was a contest for the best pictures on the internet for 2007 and the winners of the ‘Favorite Photo for Male Voters’ and ‘Favorite Photo for Female Voters’ categories really says a lot about what turns us on visually.
Here is the photo judged most pleasing by male voters:
No surprise. I would’ve liked to have seen some green nipples for realism.
Here is the photo judged most pleasing by female voters:
The lesson is clear. Men have women’s bodies on the brain, and when they can’t ogle a real woman’s body they’ll settle for a mossy likeness. Women have cute animals, babies, and maternal love on the brain. And when they can’t enjoy these things they become lawyers. In previous generations, the husband spent a few nights a week out of the house playing poker with his buddies. There was no concept of married couples sharing all aspects of their lives together. I think they had it right.
In other news, the hipster happy hour last Friday brought a lot of love, although there weren’t many authentic hipsters at Marvin, just a lot of yuppies dancing ineffectually. There was rampant binge alcoholism and some were found passed out on their couches afterwards.
This looks like it was a very sweet dream.
Hmmm…who is that, I wonder.
Do you think the chick in the first picture is shaved?
I don’t know how I feel about a girl whose hair makes you picture Andy Warhol or David Lynch.
Pleeeeease BAN PETER!!!!!
Probably a lot of men picture themselves in the crook of the woman’s arm while she croons “Poor baby!” over and over. Notice the posture of the Panda and woman are nearly identical. It only goes to prove (oh yes, this is proof!) that women want real babies, not men who act like babies. Also men have a fantasy (I think this applies to Reggie) who are ‘kind, considerate, and a big turn on 24/7′. No time for babies or realism in that scenario. In my experience, babies and children are in general infinitely more interesting than men but the same could be said in regards to women too, I suppose.
BTW lest anyone get the wrong idea, these are my subjective opinions at the moment.
ICANHASCHEEZBURGER (mostly cute animals with funny lol-speak) is very popular among men, too.
Men prefer humor, and the humor value in the first picture is higher than the second one, which has a higher awww value. Women prefer awww value to humor value, but when they coincide both women and men will like it.
Unless of course you’re just a heartless bastard.
Example of humor value: 3rd photo in roissy’s original post.
I’m envious of Peter. Nobodywants me banned.
^ Make every single post about “glorious natural pelts” and I’ll oblige you.
Ah …. the Glorious Natural Pelt. One of Nature’s finest creations, storehouse of wonderful aromas and flavors.
Peter is a muff diver. Should have known.
an expert level muff diver will never support the unshaven look. there is nothing grosser than going down on a giant unkempt bush, especially one that has been stewing in aromatic crotch juices.
i suspect peter is lying about his pube preference. the running gag has a rich and storied history.
I don’t care for the 70s-porn wild growth bush, but I do like a nice, natural-looking “triangle” — trimed, but there. Like in 80s – early 90s Playboys. Trimmed at edges, that’s all.
The sex industry (porn, strippers) went downhill during the mid-90s, with the pedophilic-grossout full shave, or bizarre and stupid-looking landing strips or other shapes in no way harmonious with a woman’s rolling topography.
I really should not have left early
Peter has monopolized the boards again. There is a happy medium between the disturbing shaved pre-pubescent look and the grossly unkempt, greasy matted bush. Can we all agree on that?
The more people empathize with animals, the more they should question their meat eating.
“Peter has monopolized the boards again”
Means:
“Somebody else has prevented me from making every one of Roissy’s posts be about me.”
17 translator
““Peter has monopolized the boards again””
Means:
“Peter has monopolized the boards again”
@18
Da hast du vollkomen recht, meine kleine Süsse.
19
“Since you have an right, my little sweet.”?
translation courtesy of http://translation.langenberg.com
I know approx. 10 words of German, my daughter knows more, but anything with “my little sweet” I am down for.
I’m envious of Peter. Nobodywants me banned.
People want to ban me. It’s obviously why girls will never love me!
Roissy, I fully disagree with your expert-level comment. But then again, I’ve slept with French Canadians.
What do these pics tell me? That most men believe if there’s grass on the field, play ball. And pandas, which appear gentle, caring and cuddly in public but are in fact unintelligent and vicious savages (hint – it’s a fucking bear) basically sum up what most women expect to end up with anyway.
I don’t care for the 70s-porn wild growth bush, but I do like a nice, natural-looking “triangle” — trimed, but there. Like in 80s – early 90s Playboys. Trimmed at edges, that’s all.
The sex industry (porn, strippers) went downhill during the mid-90s, with the pedophilic-grossout full shave, or bizarre and stupid-looking landing strips or other shapes in no way harmonious with a woman’s rolling topography.
Believe it or not, my harping about the Glorious Natural Pelt notwithstanding, I have nothing against some reasonable trimming. So long as the basic upside-down triangle is maintained, in other words. Unfortunately, far too many women today go the whole hog* and sport the loathsome and pedophilic Bald Eagle look. It’s probably tied in with the general downfall of moderation in behavior.
I am also aware that the fully shaved look is no longer an exclusively female thing. As your elementary school teacher undoubtedly told you, however, two wrongs don’t make a right. Besides, the full shave has some actual value for men, as it makes them look bigger.
* = so to speak
For the benefit of Mr. Kite
There will be a show tonight on trampoline
I already know Peter’s answer, but would the rest of you want any hair follicles anywhere below the eyebrows on your sexbot? If so, why? What is the attraction of a beard on something as lovely as a tight female you-know-what? It is concealment, nothing more.
If all females naturally lacked hair follicles in that area in the same way they lack them on their facial cheeks and someone Photoshopped a beard onto a pitcure of some young lady’s nether region, would not eveyone react to such a photo by saying “ewwww, gross!” ?
As far as I’m concerned, hair is for bears.
Peter, there is no need to answer. In your case I might just as well try converting Billy Graham to paganism.
#13 pa
pedophilic-grossout full shave
a man’s affinity for shaved quim is no more pedophilic than is a woman’s affinity for clean-shaven faces.
in fact, it’s less so, because neoteny, or, more precisely, pedomorphic characteristics, are a classic and indispensable component of traditional female allure.
i understand that some men might like the glorious natural pelt, but ‘pedophilic grossout’ sounds like echolalia from some 14-year-old, repeating the words of his angry mother (who doesn’t shave) about his new stepmother (who does).
i prefer the panda and cub.
By the by, check out Robbie Williams game. Serious negging followed by intense eye contact. If she wasn’t surrounded or on TV he could’ve seduced her without a word.
(he did steal Neil Strauss’s girlfriend)
28
“Serious negging followed by intense eye contact. If she wasn’t surrounded or on TV he could’ve seduced her without a word.”
Williams is so full of himself you could cut his bullshit with a knife. Yet another poser who considers himself God’s gift to women.. Personally, I find him creeepy. In my opinion game is getting so *yawn* old and tired. The same stupid, transparent routine with the same boring, unimaginative in/out, in/out *yawn* result.
I like the Panda picture maybe because it is what it is; a Panda with baby. The first picture is just a plant made to look like a woman.
candy cane, the day women are not seduced by game is the day men are not seduced by hot young girls.
31
Women are seduced by game because they are idiot. FACT. And vice versa.
#30 candy cane
Williams is so full of himself you could cut his bullshit with a knife. Yet another poser who considers himself God’s gift to women.. Personally, I find him creeepy.
I don’t care for him either, but the guy sleeps with numerous young, attractive women and thus meets the requirements of being a player. Sure, it has a lot to do with his fame and wealth, but we all use what we have at our disposal. What would he have to do to convince you that he’s not a poser?
In my opinion game is getting so *yawn* old and tired. The same stupid, transparent routine with the same boring, unimaginative in/out, in/out *yawn* result.
It’s too bad about the guy with the gun standing behind you and forcing you to read about it, then. I hope you escape your hostage situation.
33 Reg.
“Sure, it has a lot to do with his fame and wealth, but we all use what we have at our disposal.”
I know what you mean, but can’t relate to using what we have “at our disposal”. Disposal part does not compute. I am what I am; that is what is at my “disposal” but I don’t consider it disposable.
“It’s too bad about the guy with the gun standing behind you and forcing you to read about it, then. I hope you escape your hostage situation”
You’re silly. No one forces me to do anything. I read this stuff because is entertains me. I’d like to see someone try to stop me. You take it seriously? That’s your problem!
The third picture is by far the most unfortunate; bloated, pasty hand (with blemishes) reaching under baby shit brown comforter, for fetid (I imagine) cock under black 100% polyester shorts, wearing 50/50 cheap gray sweatshirt. One can only imagine the cum spots on this mans bedding. Not exactly a woman’s dream come true.
Robbie Williams! Thank you!