This post is also available in: Deutsch
Jay in DC writes as a jerk who earned his jerkitude the hard way — by circumstance and experience instead of gifted to him by the cosmic overlord.
I unfortunately find myself walking down this same road. But I got here in an odd way. I was on the OTHER side of this equation for almost a decade. Law Enforcement and Prison were my job. The thing is, because you are dealing with literal animals all day, its adapt or die. So you get hard as fuck just like the creatures you have to “handle”.
This is also when I noticed the pussy starting to flow like mana from heaven. Couple that with already being a bit of a natural alpha and very decent looking (think young pre-insane Charlie Sheen) and yeah… I slayed vag for 2 decades straight.
In the last few years, I was on the OTHER side of the bars and that shit ain’t no kinda fun. Not going to get into the whole story but I nearly was killed in the process by overzealous cocksuckers who like to play “soldier” against US Citizens. (read: SWAT faggots)
Survived, but it just made what I already was much much worse. I have true killer instinct now because if I’m ever threatened in such a way again, I will put you in the fucking ground even if I’m going with you.
The thing is, this is a double edged sword. You usually have to soften this up around chicks because if you are ‘full on’ they will be afraid. Some natural charisma will leave them fearful but turned on. It is a balancing act for certain.
That last paragraph is crucial. Most men don’t readily grasp how entwined fear and arousal are in women. When men are aroused by the sight of a hottie, fear is not the emotion rumbling through us. There’s a bit of fear just before the approach, but that’s the fear of rejection and hurt pride, not the fear of physical harm, and it vanishes as quickly as it appears. Women….they’re different. Powerful, dangerous men arouse them, but these men also could hurt them, badly, in ways Mean Girls can never do. That fear is always present in women and it’s always bound closely with the men women find most alluring — the jerks, the assholes, the powerful, the strong, the sociopathic, the charismatic, the passionate, the unpredictable, the ambitious, and the reckless. The irresistible man is also the uncontrollable man, and women are fated to love the very men who could crush them as easily as they crush weaker men.
So when women say they are “intimidated” by sexy men, they aren’t lying, nor are they denying their sexual interest. A sexy man is necessarily an intimidating man, in one form or another, or he wouldn’t be sexy to women. Fear and arousal are hitched to the female id and work in concert to coax her to a fulfilling relinquishment to the insistent and desirous sex of a powerful man. Grrlpower is a temporary phase shift in the sexual market; a response by women to the emasculated soyboys who leave them cold. What women really want, beneath the feminist posturing for social media head pats, is to embrace their vulnerability and repose in their femininity, reflected through the overpowering lust of a man who doesn’t take to the leash.
This is why dangerous men have to walk it back and soften their hard edge, and why your typical beta male mediocrity has to find his inner jerk and turn it up. Without that element of fear, women won’t feel the white hot passion they are all capable of feeling for a man. But too much fear and women’s survival instinct will override their desire. (Not all women, though. Many such cases of women ignoring their fear response in favor of their furrow response, and paying the toll later.) This is where the fear-charisma axis comes into play; charisma, aka a self-knowing facility with teasing banter, relaxes women just enough to allow their fear of a powerful man to sublimate as carnality. This is why a woman will sometimes confess in the afterglow that the idea of you “having your way with her” turned her on so much. That’s the chord of fear you skillfully plucked in her which merged with the rhythm of her desire to elevate her to ecstatic surrender.
I loved that he was so powerful I was nothing.