An enterprising reader (call name: ireallymissyareally) already put my Condescension Game suggestion to use (if only the government worked this fast).
![](https://web.archive.org/web/20170610073852im_/https://heartiste.files.wordpress.com/2017/06/perceptive.jpeg?w=500&h=889)
Victory. This reader’s patronus is Birthday Cat.
And now I will take a long acid bath to wash the gayness of Harry Potter references off me.
[crypto-donation-box]