This post is also available in: German
A reader passed along a Game tactic he uses on Tinder which in my opinion would work equally well offline. (FYI Trump is causing Tinder to lose users.) The reader calls it Plausible Deniability Game, but I think a better term would be Sexual Redirection Game.
There’s a trick I’ve developed when talking to girls on tinder that is way more effective than I even thought it would be. After the initial couple of messages, I’ll ask something like “what do you do for fun?”.
Women love to talk about how interesting they think they are, so this gives her a chance to run her mouth and get engaged in the conversation. So once she’s done saying shit like “oh you know, walking my fur babies, volunteering, drinking organic responsibly sourced whiskey, bla bla”, 80% of the time they’ll ask “What do YOU like to do for fun?”
I’m not a huge fan of open-ended questions during a pickup, because as often as not they tongue-tie the less excitable women who can’t think of any response. It’s like asking “What’s your favorite movie?”; there are too many options to think of one on the spot, and this sort of question can cause awkward stutters in the conversational flow during a date or first meeting. But the open-ended question “What do you do for fun?” may skirt the issue. The Modren Woman loves to talk about fun, having fun, doing fun, being fun, being around fun…it will be easy for her to think of a hundred ways she participates in fun fun fun. And like the reader says, most of the time she’ll return the question, which opens new avenues of seduction potential.
This is where you get her mind on sex without activating the anti-slut defense shield. I usually respond with something like
“Canoeing, hiking, shooting my gun, having sex, going to the gym, splitting atoms, reading the news, slaying dragons, you know, just the usual stuff”.
Now, there’s a lot of moving parts here but every girl I’ve used it on has loved it.
1. I’ve blended “having sex” in the middle of strenuous, physically invigorating activities so the gears in her head are turning about what it must be like.
2. I’ve put it in the middle of the list to remove any hint or desperation. This comes with an air of aloofness and hints at preselexxxion.
3. I’ve also attached hilarious and absurd activities like “splitting atoms” and “slaying dragons” to make it an obviously playful statement, and it inspires playfulness in return.
EVERY SINGLE TIME, I get something back like “wow I see a lot of my favorite activities in there ?”
PLAUSIBLE DENIABILITY. She wants to hint at her desire to get cervix hammered without flat out saying so. The conversations always COME ALIVE after this exchange.
I like the cut of this reader’s psy ops. Misdirection and subliminal associations? We don’t see that often enough. The most effective facet of the ruse is contained in #2, where the reader defangs the sexual redirection by burying it in a list of less erotic activities. #3 is important too; most of my successes were when I was in a playful, devil-may-care mood.
It’s a tenet of proactive seduction (game) that a man should introduce sexual themes and sexual tension sooner rather than later, which means in practice the first date. A man who makes it through the first date without some kind of sexualized banter is not having a second date. (If he is, it won’t be any second date worth having.)
The sooner sexual language is introduced, the more your rhetoric should provide plausibly deniable cover for the change in tone from friendly to sexual. I WANT YOUR HOT BOD works when she’s one foot over the bedroom threshold; it doesn’t work so well as a reply when she asks your name (well, it can, but you’d better have rock solid frame in the delivery and follow-up). So if you want to steer that convo to salacious innuendo before she’s downed her drink, you need playfulness, cockiness, and a bit of the ol’ rhetorical legerdemain to soften her up to The Hardening.