If you ever receive a dubious excuse from a girl who has cancelled a date at the last second, the best reply is an ambiguous one that could be interpreted as either sarcastic disbelief or sincere sympathy. For example,
GIRL: Sorry I can’t make it! My grandma fell and can’t get up. I have to take her to the hospital.
YOU: wow
That’s it. The insidious beauty of this one word reply is that, in the event her excuse was genuine, your muted exclamation can easily fill in as a plausible expression of condolence. If she’s lying, she’ll be psychologically self-groomed to interpret your “wow” as a jerkboy dismissal, and your value to her as a sexual being will go up.
“wow” is a great all-purpose ambiguous message that can springboard into all sorts of flirty conversation.
YOU: wow
GIRL: You don’t believe me? No really my grandma fell.
YOU: ok. say hi to grandma for me.
or…
YOU: wow
GIRL: don’t be such an asshole.
YOU: wow that sucks. I hope she feels better.
You can really screw with a girl’s head if you’re familiar with the art of ambiguity.
[…] Ambiguity Is The Psyche Of Game […]
> “wow”
Also, ‘huh’.
Or, if you’re a true sociopath, “cool”.
GIRL: Sorry I can’t make it! My grandma fell and can’t get up. I have to take her to the hospital.
YOU: Cool.
GIRL: WTF? My Grandma is in agonizing pain. You’re an ass. I hate you.
YOU: No, I meant I’m cool with it. Now chill, babe, and get grandma to the hospital.
Then after getting her hamster all to revving, if you want to prove what a tender soft cuddly lion cub you really are, you can surprise her by showing up at the hospital and giving her a shoulder to cry on.
And trying to slip your hand in her pants right there in the hospital with doctors and nurses and orderlies walking past you.
ambiguity is the psyche of game….yeah if ya a fuckin mangina acktin like like a woman tryin to score ya bunch of sadcunts
GIRL: Sorry I can’t make it! My grandma fell and can’t get up. I have to take her to the hospital.
GBFM: yah sorryz she keepz chasing my aszz
I thought you were gonna say that she lost her balance fakking you standing up. But maybe you’re Baptist. lulz
shoot i would have thought ‘oh hey no problem at all if there is anything i can do just let me know i am here for you’ would be the way to go
That would be hilarious. Send back a “omg that’s terrible send me your address I’ll be right over to take you to the hospital,” then watch with glee how quickly and magically her grandmother heals.
it’s a miracle!
The point is not to prove she’s lying, but how to deal with it when she does.
Nah, done that experiment and can report the results, from my Beta-tude days.
There’s a high probability that you would simply get a response back such as “Thanks but we are already on the way” or similar.
With the result that there’s still no way for knowing if you’ve been genuinely ditched or otherwise.
I thought he was being sarcastic.
For precisely the reasons you’re pointing out.
Roger that – I should have picked up on that given the nature of the discussion. TMARs repsonse added to my misinterpretation however.
“Do you need a date for her funeral?”
Wow is a godsend for gaming the experienced girl. Any time she tries to impress you with the ‘where’s the craziest place you’ve had sex, I once had sex X or Y…’ just a smirk and ‘wow,’ with nothing more really works wonders. Drives ‘em crazy.
Dammit CH you should have written this yesterday. I had a girl flake on my last night with a grandma excuse too and this is exactly what I needed.
Her: You’re going to kill me, but we may have to reschedule. My Grandparents called for me to come over and help them with a few things tonight. Please don’t hate me haha 🙂
Me: No Granny why! shoot me a text if you’re up to hang out later.
-No response that night, and of course I haven’t sent any more texts.
Now before the shark-frenzy of commentators get on my ass for coming off as needy – she was cute but not hot (6-7) and I am a 8-9 (just on looks) and was trying to come off as attainable
> “No Granny why!”
???
yeah i think that’s like “no, granny, why?” as opposed to “no granny, why?” as if he wanted a piece of granny. but if you use punctuation at all, best make it clear. preferably skip the punctuation altogether.
i think no punctuation is a useful note to take away, along with the ambiguity in general. a lot of things in text can be interpreted in different ways, which is the key to this– plausible asshole deniability with the tingles the asshole idea causes in her.
as to original questioner, good that you didn’t follow up, it wasn’t a great response but you already know that, the end. at least you didn’t say “i could never hate you”
> “a lot of things in text can be interpreted in different ways, which is the key to this– plausible asshole deniability with the tingles the asshole idea causes in her.”
Running two [or more] levels of meaning with precisely the same syntax is the sort of thing that really famous poets do.
Really seriously Mega-High-IQ stuff.
For instance, lotsa folks now believe that the ostensible “meaning” of The Sonnets has absolutely no relationship whatsoever with their true meaning:
http://www.shakespearesmonument.com/
Something like that could be done with Game Theory and 140-byte TXTing, but it would require some seriously intensive mental elbow grease to make it work.
That book is fucking huge. I didn’t look at the page count before ordering it, but it’s as big as my biggest dictionary.
Be warned. Be safe.
He sound like a rasta mon
“e: No Granny why! shoot me a text if you’re up to hang out later.”
110% pure unmitigated beta #FAIL
“I am a 8-9 (just on looks) and was trying to come off as attainable”
Yeah. me too. Every time I fuck up, it’s because of that.
Didn’t realize you were infallible. That makes one of us. Congrats
I spend a lot of time on radio links (aircraft) where concision and accuracy count.
Ironically, a terse “understood”, when processing a flake notice that may be sincere, generates ambiguity. It can be a “I understand since I’m such a sensitive guy” or it can be “I understand you’re flaking.”
Though I guess this is age-related, people who cancel a date using a passive-aggressive medium like SMS, in my thinking, all go in the “she’s flaking” bucket. I’ve never gone out with a woman who cancels and doesn’t call me. A texted cancellation just means she has something better on her agenda.
I’ve gotten “oh no” in these circumstances. It’s nicer than “wow” IF she interprets it as sympathy. But she can also interpret it as “oh no I can’t believe you’re a flake”.
“nicer” = “less effective”
“nicer”=”less effective” this is a key element to developing inner game.
“Oh no” sounds way too accommodating.
“Oh…” is more effective from an “ambiguity” perspective.
I use “Oh…” and it usually leads to a huge explanation
“Sorry I didn’t get back to you, I left my phone in the office.”
Me: “Oh…”
Why don’t you have a bun in your oven yet?
She’s trying to underpopulate the world.
> “Why don’t you have a bun in your oven yet?”
Thread winner.
Next thread.
I thought that was you.
You have disciples now. God help us all.
BOO-YAH!!!
Most of us are heretics though. We only want white bread.
when dealing with Latinas, whenever they say “thanks, I respond “de nalgas,” which means “I did it for you because of your nice ass” and is a play on “de nada” of course. they looooooove it. OMG that’s so ruuuude!!
last one really didn’t know if I really didn’t know what I had said. that was the one where I was 40% alpha with her but still fucked it up with 60% beta including nice dinner on first date.
I finally learned my lesson on that. no more dinner dates. as ya really said, I can’t think the rules don’t apply to me.
when going latina, bordering on chola territory, you can just fully use ‘bitch’ in conversation and ask her what time you should come rape her tonight, she’ll smile like a ray of sunshine has melted her heart.
…filing this under the bastard births to hispanics statistics I read last night.
“Grassy ass” is a good “thanks” for the Latina set in the same vein… Always good for a laugh.
Baby steps, right? I have yet another field report from yesterday’s day gaming, as I have decided to take YaReally’s advice to take advantage of my “strengths” (situation). Since I don’t like drinking alcohol, inhaling second-hand smoke in bars, or staying out late and getting no sleep, and online dating sucks, my thing has to be day game. As YaReally said, I can still day game 2 hours per day, on the street, from 6 until 8 or 8 until 10 and still get enough sleep.
More baby steps:
So yesterday I went to the local track to run sprints. At the track there was a “track club,” which I plan on joining for obvious reasons. In the track club, of course, were about 4 hotties and one mega-hottie true 10 (in my book–9 for those who say a 10 does not exist in nature). She is probably 22, beautiful face, perfect body, latina. Seriously fine.
So I run my sprint interval workout and complete the entire thing (6 quarter-miles and eight 100s) during the the “track club” just sits there stretching for 1.5 hours, as is typical of those things. It’s clearly a social club and they do very little training. They managed to jog 2 laps (1/2 mile) during the time I worked my ass of doing an interval workout.
Getting to the FR. So I was watching the HB10 when I could but I don’t think she detected any bet male gaze or violation of 3 second rule as I was doing my running from afar. But at the end of my last 100M sprint, she happened to be sitting there stretching–it was like God gave me this opportunity. Her group had finally started running but she was sitting this one out.
I was super exhausted and in pain from sprinting (I’m out of shape…only started doing sprints again 3 weeks ago and was reminded that it is very hard to force yourself to work that hard doing squats in a gym). As I’m freakin’ way out of breath with heart rate probably 180 bpm, I walk/limp up right beside her and say (I’m kind of standing over her…she’s sitting and stretching):
Me: Running is painful.
Her: (smiles/laughs a little) Yeah.
Me: What is this, some kind of track club? (she had seen me running sprints but not being part of their group for the preceding 1.5 hours)
Her: Yeah. We all know each other and come out here and run. This is only my second time.
Me: Cool. So I can just come and join and run with you guys?
Her: Yeah.
Me: Every Monday and Wednesday at 7? (another guy had already told me that…I ran some 100s with him…not all of them are there for social hour and some break off and actually train)
Her: Yep.
Me: Cool. I might do that next week. Why are you sitting this one out? (she is in phenomenal shape and was one of the faster ones, male or female, during the laps they did)
Her: I’m just getting back into it. I just had surgery.
Me: Oh. Yeah, I used to run but I’m just getting back into it (and I pat my fat beer belly, which I kind of have).
Her: smiles or laughs.. I forget
Me: Well, enjoy. (then I walk off)
Now….what should I have done? If I may say, here is my beta hangup in this situation. I have been told by girls, including hotties I have fucked such as my ex GF, that girls really do have this attitude that they don’t go to the gym to get hit on and they find it annoying. That really –and I realize this is part of my beta mindset– informs my actions in these situations and I try to be the “special snowflake beta man” and prove that I’m not that annoying guy who is going to ask them out.
But why? They don’t mind getting hit on if it’s the right alpha, right? It would be okay if we were drunk in a bar, but I can’t get her # when it’s clear we have at least one thing on common…going to a track to run and be healthy during the daytime.
So it’s like, again, like re the waitress about whom I posted yesterday: I have no trouble talking to a girl, even a hottie, looking her in the eye, talking slowly and in a deep voice, being at ease….then I don’t seal the deal and actually ask for her number because my beta mindset is like I’m proving I’m not “the typical guy” who hits on her when she’s at the track or gym to work out.
Which of course does nobody any good…..I have nothing to lose and she might actually like me.
So what’s the play there…. “put your number in my phone” after the above interaction? aCtuyally I didn’t even have my phone. I could have said:
“I’ll go to my car and get my phone and come back and you can put your number in it”?
What?
Another thing is, like with anything, women rarely do anything alone, so most women I see on the track are very clearly there with a male training partner/boyfriend, but this particular woman did not seem to be “with” any of the other track club members.
So the general question is, what is the deal re girls not wanting to be hit on when they’re at the gym to work out? Same rule as always? They don’t want to be hit on by beta creepers but if I’m alpha enough, they DO want to be hit on?
“girls…have this attitude that they don’t go to the gym to get hit on and they find it annoying.”
unless the guy is really hawt…assume that she thinks that you are hawt
“I hope your surgery came out Ok and stuff didn’t end up in the wrong place” [as you check out her boobs and ass with an inquiring expression] “Yup, looks Ok.”
Get her to talk with open-ended questions. She needs to invest in the convo.
“And why did you join the track club? Do you have any history of running track?”
She had a lot less invested in the convo than you.
At least she didn’t mention having a bf. Go back and try again. HB10′s might be approached a lot less than they want.
““I’ll go to my car and get my phone and come back and you can put your number in it”?”
No, “I need to get something from my car. Let’s chat while I go get it.” You relocate her and get her invested and obeying you.
need to date a Latina just so I can use this golden line
> “fucked it up with 60% beta including nice dinner on first date”
God in Heaven it sucks that you can’t just go out on a date and have a fun time.
That you have to be an asshole instead of relaxing and enjoying yourself.
Fuck this shit.
Yeah, a man’s gotta eat. With me, it’s not even a matter of spending too much on a girl. I have a lot of money, and $200 for a good meal with eye candy is no skin off my nose. The problem is twofold. The first concerns her. She thinks you’re beta for trying so hard to impress (older chicks tend not to think this so much, though; so if you are older, it’s not so much of an issue). The second is you: Do you really want to be all gassy, farting, and having to take a shit when you are trying to screw her? No. I thought not. Go out to eat after you fuck her, then take her home. Start your night early. If you live in a big city, going out to eat at 10 or later is not big deal. Done and done. (Maybe this is older, rich man’s game, though.)
But the fact that you can’t even just relax and let your guard down and enjoy your life.
That you always have to be on edge.
Always needing to work an angle and insert a shiv of cruelty like a fucking sociopath.
God damn the Frankfurt School and what They have done to our civilization.
Oh, and only take her out to eat afterwards if YOU are hungry . Getting her out of your home is the ultimate goal, but don’t force yourself to do anything you don’t want. After dinner, don’t ask her if she wants to go home, just take her. If you don’t know where she lives ask, or hail a cab. If she’s poor, toss her ten bucks, and blow her a kiss good-bye. If you have post-coital regret and just want her gone and you’re too nice to kick her out of your home, go out for ice cream, a drink, or something. I hate sleepovers.
But I’m a nice guy, really!
One last point. I generally don’t like going to her house (which, granted, allows for an easier escape). Most single women live like pigs. I don’t know what they spend their money on, but it’s not their home. They see my place, though, and they get all wide-eyed and hot.
‘no more dinner dates.’
http://replygif.net/i/95.gif
…
You can take ‘em to dinner if you want. Just -after- you get the goods. I don’t do dinner because it’s boring.
De knockers.
I have a fever anyway. Get well soon.
Keep it simple.
Even “wow” is too much. My favorite is a simple, non-committal “k” (no caps). Then ignore all other texts from her for a week or so.
Explanation: if she’s lying, you’re punishing her. If she’s not making it up, you’re giving her “time to get through the crisis” (your eventual explanation).
And if she never texts you back, it wasn’t to be. MOA
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=moa
moa == ???
Move On Along
Sorry, I thought everyone here knew the acronym. Means either “Move Out Already” (if you’re shacked up) or “Move On Already” (ie. to fresh conquests), depending on context..
I thought it mean minute of angle…..as in shooting accuracy.
LOL GR8YT
+1 for speaking my language.
My first thought too, heh.
Great advice, never really considered how effective that is.
Off topic but will be appreciated by the CH crowd. Over on Reddit a debate was going on after some guy posted this. His kid came out black. There apparently were actually people telling him that he should “man up” and take care of the kid as his own! Delusional.
http://i.imgur.com/MfL8Qez.png
http://www.reddit.com/user/I_need_money_-_-
My go-to reply is “yep”, which usually follows with a flurry of texts from her explaining why she’s flaking. I follow the CH’s patented Golden Ratio by giving her instructions on when and where to meet me, and they eagerly comply.
When she doesn’t reply, I know that she wasn’t really interested to begin with, so I drop her like a smelly deuce and immediately next her.
Dropped her like a smelly deuce. Nailed it.
fucking excellent.
wow, k, yep, uh huh, etc… all butthurt tryhard. What would a HB9′s reply be? NOTHING. Total silence because she’s already moved on to the next spinning plate.
The flake failed. As several wise men have said here before, a woman votes with her feet.
High value = she’s texting Grandma lame excuses why she can’t come to the hospital because she won’t dare cancel a date with you.
Do not engage in these drama games. She has to earn your attention with good behavior. There are over 3 billion women on this planet. NEXT.
How about “thats too bad” with a smiley face?
no for the love of god, no smiley face. no emoticons, period.
> “no emoticons, period.”
Oh man, if you were true alpha sociopath…
GIRL: Sorry I can’t make it! My grandma fell and can’t get up. I have to take her to the hospital.
YOU: Birthday Cake Cat GIF
http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2013/11/29/jerkboy-charisma-chat-game/
GIRL: Sorry I can’t make it! My grandma fell and can’t get up. I have to take her to Sacred Heart Hospital.
YOU: wow. my uncle is head internist there. i’ll tell him to give her extra tlc
Haha the grandparents excuse is brutal… the last time a girl flaked I just ‘ok’ and it worked perfectly… as in I hit it the next time I saw her.
Fred Reed’s long-lost brother John T. on Nevada.
http://www.johntreed.com/BLM-Nevada-rancher-showdown.html
“Obama sent those BLM police and their dogs and guns and tasers there solely to bluff the Tea Party crowd. He had no intention of shooting anyone or letting the dogs attack anyone.
Not unlike Assad in Syria and Putin in Crimea, the Nevada rancher and his supporters called Obama’s bluff. He promptly folded thereby admitting he was bluffing. The rancher and his supporters were not bluffing. They were ready to die—and kill BLM officers and dogs—for their beliefs. When two sides face off, and one side is willing to die for their beliefs and the other is not, the side that is willing to die will win, perhaps without firing a shot. The subsequent BLM official statement was that they left to avoid loss of life. Like I said. He who leaves to avoid loss of life loses.
Obama is a serial bluffer. His “red lines” and “consequences” and all that. That bluffing every time is the same mistake the boy who cried wolf made. Obama may get us all killed with that crap. As any poker player can tell you, if you never bluff, you can only win when you have good cards. But if you always bluff, you will not win for long. You will lose. When it’s the president who is doing it, we are the ones who may lose.”
I’m going to disagree with that last statement. I fear Obama and his fellow travelers far more than any foreigner he is supposedly protecting me from.
ain’t bluffing when those hellfire missiles hit the houses
you don’t have to worry about another country thinking we won’t come and kill them I can guarantee you that
BLM and the.FBI HRT will just wait a month then go in and kill that rancher and his whole family. With guns if they cause no more embarassment, with fire otherwise.
John T Reed has some excellent books. I’m reading several on real estate right now.
I just heard an ad on the radio for a guy who was eating out of a dumpster last week and now can teach you to make “fuck you” money flipping houses just like he did. On that topic, I can recommend Reed’s book on hyperinflation and depression. Now if he’d just write one on how to remain sane until god has mercy and hits the big red reset button…
Except that the rancher is a Mormon with connections. He’s not going down like Joseph Smith, alone in a cabin.
Smith was executed by a lynch mob while in jail in Nauvoo, IL, the morning after the Illinois governor assured him of his safety — and then left town with his order-policing militia.
Essentially, it was Benghazi, only with the white guys playing the part of AQ.
Thanks for the correction. Interesting parallels to Leo Frank.
Last date canceled I got a text two days before scheduled time (Friday): “sorry I won’t be able to make it cause I got an exam on Saturday.”
To me that sounded like BS. My answer was: “Ok”
She got it … she hasnt disturbed me anymore. But I can see how “wow” would have left the door more open
‘wow’ wouldn’t work for that particular flake.
‘exams suck’, ‘boring’, ‘lame’, ‘sure’, or no response – those would all be better.
> “‘exams suck”
Here’s a nicely vague and ambiguous reply: “SUX 2 B U”
“u have an exam on the weekend?”
“What kind of exam? Gynecological or Proctological?”
Also, at the risk of coming off as hopelessly butthurt, you could dig the shiv in pretty hard here if you were in the mood.
“Wow. A Gynecological exam on Saturday morning? Did you catch herpes?”
“Wow. I knew a girl who went in on a Saturday morning for a Proctological exam to have the venereal warts excised from her anus.”
“Wow. I heard that Saturday morning was when Planned Parenthood did most of their butchering. Are you studying the literature that they gave you?”
Dark-humor lolz to that.
“saturday exam… right.” Then ignore for a few days, or longer, or forever.
they do have exams on weekends, grandpa
That has nothing to do with your answer. She’s flaking when she sends these texts the vast majority of the time, and his response was ok to that. It’s even ambiguous.
“I meant right, as in I understand”
None of the universities I’ve been at have weekend exams.
Some community colleges might, maybe? I *think* I recall the local CC having weekend classes, but I might not be remembering correctly.
I’m not sure any response is necessary for someone who flakes like this…surely she knew about the test when she accepted the date?
Yeah, she asked on Monday: I have this crazy idea, let’s meet on Friday? whatcha say?
Me: 9:30 at X.
She: great!
So easy. Then the flake … she claimed she hadn’t had time to study. She didn’t suggested any other time and I wasnt that interested to suggest myself (which I think was her move).
It’s the usual girl move: I’m not that interested but wanna check if he wants to meet me.
She asked *you* out? Interesting. Usually the person doing the asking is the one who is more invested. Is it possible she decided she was too forward and was trying to retreat? In any event, not replying would likely have elicited another text from her.
Kate received great exhilaration and delight when she strategically positioned her face near the blast epicenter.
I made her nostrils dance.
She also received the following benefits, all for the mere $5000 she paid :
Hair straightening from the blast force
Skin exfoliation and moisturizing
Teeth whitening (plaque removed by ultrasonic sound vibes)
Moustache hair removal by searing
Deeeeeeep aromatherapy (and I mean deeeeeeep)
Sinus and nasal decongestion
Free heat during the chilly night
A great bargain. To get all that for just $5000 (and in just a few tens of seconds) is great value. I could charge more, but that would be mean..
Hopefully also a waxing around her naughty bits.
> “Yeah, she asked on Monday: I have this crazy idea, let’s meet on Friday? whatcha say?”
Good God, if she can’t remain loyal to you for a mere four days – from Monday until Friday – then thank your lucky stars that you never got seriously involved with her.
Also, use it as a lesson in how to deal with these flakey nutjob mentally unstable cunts.
In particular, realize that if you wanna dip your stick in it, then you will need to move quickly, while the tinglez are still there.
SHE: I have this crazy idea, let’s meet on Friday? whatcha say?
YOU: Nah, I’m busy on Friday. But I’ll swing by your place tonight after 10PM. See you then.
Yeah, the thing was I didn’t want to be seen as needy (which I wasn’t by the way as I was just taking this girl as a playground to test my recently acquired RP knowledge) and thus I set the date some days later. But hey, everything I get increases my knowledge. Let it be welcome
“sorry i don’t do proctosigmoidoscopies on saturday”
oral exam?
I take flakes as helpful: I gather information and now know where not to spend my time and resources. The clever ripostes that people keep dreaming up puzzle me. Even the effort to snark back is worth more than a flaking girl is worth. Drive on.
If I’m really pissed off, I just don’t reply. I’ve gotten some funny “you got my message right?” texts from that.
By the way … what about when it was a flake and a lot of days/weeks later they show up again pinging, how to proceed? Call her out and “No second chances with me” (might sound butthurt) or act as if nothing had hapenned (the girl may think she can walk all over you again)?
Any advice is welcome
no butthurt response. no planning anything around her.
if you’re at home and doing nothing, ‘at my place now. movie + wine. 123 elm st’
if you’re going out, ‘i’ll be @ whiskey’s in an hour, feel free to join’.
any response from her which is tantamount to ‘no’ after that is ignored until the next time (e.g. days later) she reaches out.
> “‘at my place now. movie + wine. 123 elm st’”
YES.
I like the authoritative tone of voice there.
> “‘i’ll be @ whiskey’s in an hour, feel free to join’.”
NO.
Leave off the “, feel free to join”.
It sounds too beta.
I love the pre-flake texts:
ME: 630 El Bar Dive
HER: OK! See you then, if work doesn’t get crazy.
ME: right
“Right” is universally recognized as sarcasm, and it is sarcasm. (Except when it isn’t?)
I don’t know if it reduces the chance she’ll flake at 6:30, since the pre-flake excuse-building means she’s waiting for something better to come along, but it allows me to do this when the almost inevitable flake comes:
HER: Sorry!!! My boss is making me stay late. Big project! Rain check?
ME: right
Nah, you say, “Works out for me better, too. :)” Now you use the smiley face correctly as in “in your face, I got a hot date.”
Hopefully, you’ve been working on lining up a replacement.
no. spiteful, transparent, and transparently false.
what do girls always say when they want to say no as politely as possible?
‘probably, lot going on next week’
Not if you’ve lined up a replacement like you ought. Then you post pics on fb of the two of you. Or you go to a bar and get a selfie with a chick there and post that on fb. There are many ways to make this fly and have a good time.
Fuck, that’s complicated. Keep life simple, man. Plus, I’d never do a selfie and I don’t have FB.
> “Fuck, that’s complicated.”
No kidding.
You should read some of the shit that YaReally posts about what you might call “counter-measures”.
Such as the lengths that he goes to in order to keep a bitch from ever learning the true location [physical address] of his own crib.
Or to keep the bitch’s husband from blowing his fucking head off with a shotgun.
Fucking “burn phones” and shit.
It’s a dangerous, complicated job, but I guess that somebody’s gotta do it.
Or to keep the bitch’s husband from blowing his fucking head off with a shotgun.
Really? I just lost a measure of respect for him then. Not because he’s banging some wife (though that in and of itself is reprehensible and an attack on men more than women), but because he isn’t smart enough to realize that a lot of men with guns are men with resources and training and that he *will* be tracked down, eventually, and made into a pile of bloody entrails and goo. You fuck around that way too long and the reaper, he will come a’knockin’. Read about it nearly every day in the papers. And when it does, no amount of “game” or any other well laid, ten paragraph detailed plans will me jack shit. Disappointing.
“Not because he’s banging some wife (though that in and of itself is reprehensible and an attack on men more than women)”
If he does his job and keeps her satisfied, she won’t look for cock on the side. It’s impossible to seduce a girl who thinks her man is better than me. If his chick is sucking the cock of a reprehensible piece of shit like me, it means she thinks he’s lower value than I am in some way…that should make that guy take a long hard look at himself, ’cause snuffing me out won’t change the fact that his wife thinks he’s low value and she’ll be sucking some other guy off in a bar bathroom after my funeral lol
“he isn’t smart enough to realize that a lot of men with guns are men with resources and training and that he *will* be tracked down, eventually, and made into a pile of bloody entrails and goo.”
I’m smart enough to realize that the men who would ACTUALLY go through with any of that are generally the same men who are alpha enough that their wives aren’t looking to get railed by other cock.
On top of all that, society has shifted to where most people blame the girl for being a cheating whore instead of the guy for just busting a nut where he can. ’cause at the end of the day I’m a single dude just getting pussy that makes itself available to me…SHE’S the one breaking vows and trust and commitment.
This isn’t 1920 where I’m fooling around with the farmer’s wife while he polishes his shotgun collection downstairs lol This is 2014 where his wife has a profile on Tinder and is out on girls’ nights out looking for dick because her beta schlub husband works a cubicle job that eats away at his soul.
“And when it does, no amount of “game” or any other well laid, ten paragraph detailed plans will me jack shit. Disappointing.”
Actually it wouldn’t be that difficult to talk someone out of an angry state. Very few people are going to keep up a level 10 rage all the way through weeks of tracking someone down and the drive to their house and oops they didn’t answer the door this time okay I’ll try again tomorrow etc. They’re more likely to show up with maybe a 7/10 level of anger, if that, and it’s not real hard to talk someone out of that…there’s a reason police don’t just open fire on everyone, a lot of times you can talk someone down.
Now maybe if they walked in on us banging and there was a gun in arm’s reach, but that’s why I don’t fuck taken girls in their husband’s home lol
Sometimes a wife will come after a player and he won’t know that she’s married; or a jealous bf will show up unexpectedly when you’re playing fun and games. Or some drunk cunt will play grabass or grabtit with you right in front of her man.
If you’re playin’ you better be preparin’.
As soon as she starts excuse-building, just go stealth and make other plans.
^ This.
She will lie, beg, borrow and steal to make the date if she sees you as high value. Anything less is a backhanded slap in your face.
You think she’d give her favorite “celebrity” any excuses? NEXT.
“work always gets crazy. reschedule”
The topic of abortion came up in my philosophy class today.
Based on student reactions, it seems like maybe only 2 or three of us out of a class of 40 or so opposed it.
One girl, who I had pegged as the conservative type, openly scoffed at the idea of abortion being wrong, blurting out, “pfft… What woman could ENJOY being pregnant?!”
She was sitting right behind me, so I turned around in my seat, looked her in the eye and said, “Are you kidding me?”
Her face looked mortified. She let out a nervous laugh, and I turned back around.
The overall attitude in the room was disturbing to me, to say the least. Abortion isn’t something I’m totally passionate about, but the idea of taking an innocent life simply because it would otherwise be a little inconvenience to you, deeply bothers me to say the least.
The leftists, who are supposedly the ones looking out for those who can’t look out for themselves, show no value for the one type of human life that hasn’t had the opportunity to become scum yet. It’s as if they think children are parasites or something.
Was instantly turned off to every woman in the room.
What was the racial composition of the class? Had to ask.
Understandable.
This is one of the few classes I have where it’s mostly white kids. And by mostly I mean about 60%. All the cute white girls in the class might as well have been coat hangering themselves to prove their points, though. Gross.
Answered this yesterday but it got caught up in moderation.
It’s one of my few classes where it’s been majority white. And why that I mean maybe 60% white.
Not a fun school to be at.
Was instantly turned off to every woman in the room.
You mean you were turned off them, or they were turned off you?
Anyhow, don’t worry about it. When I was an undergrad I used to wonder how I could be the only “conservative” around. Then I got older and realized that people, and life in general, get better with age – half your class is either afraid to say what they really feel, or they’ll change with maturity. Give it ten years.
The truth is that being “conservative” during the years when most people are busy having irresponsible fun is kind of nerdy, anyway (not incorrect, but nerdy).
I was turned off them.
I offered a little input on the issue, but nothing major. I already have the reputation as the campus right wing asshole, but it’s done more good than anything.
I get eye fucked in that class every day.
One of the oldest cliches in the world is the truest: “If you’re a conservative at 20 you have no heart but if you’re a liberal at 40 you have no brain.” That is all.
I have no heart.
One girl, who I had pegged as the conservative type, openly scoffed at the idea of abortion being wrong
This is another interesting point. I have found, very frequently, that my surmises about these sorts of things were wrong. People can surprise you. It can be disappointing, but also fun, to discover that a person isn’t what you thought.
It’s a trick people play.
Depending on the setting, it can be beneficial to look like the enemy. If they see that you’re “one of them,” yet you’re promoting new ideas, they’re more likely to come around.
We should encompass every class, every clique, and every cultural outlet. It’s a culture war, after all.
> “It’s a culture war, after all.”
The Frankfurt School plays for keeps.
And their ultimate goal is the absolute destruction and annihilation and eradication of us.
These motherfuckers starved to death 10 million Ukrainians in the Holodomor, without even batting an eyelash.
Do you think that they give a shit about all these unborn babies being murdered?
It’s a win-win-win for them: Convincing the Shkotzim to murder themselves.
lol silly Resovoir Tip.
Bet you a thousand bucks that 90% of those ‘personally for’ abortion would gladly have any alpha (to them)’s baby. Ya this is based off remarks and personal experience. A woman who truly loves a man wants to have his baby.
Feminism = shit test. Remember dat.
Play a prank on them: lock the door, remove some guns and start braining them like that VT chink. Hilarious!
I keep pics of aborted babies on my phone for all the people who look but can see.
See what?
See what they lookin at.
go to right to life marches if they have em anymore nice chicks
Watching a video of an actual abortion should be a compulsory part of sex education in schools but there is so much bullshit surrounding this subject that even adults are protected from its stark realities.
OT, but any thoughts on slob game if the rest of your game is tight? Any non-negotiables? No probs with clean sheets and bathroom but I’m effed if I’m gonna put potpourri out…
not really. just don’t leave anything obviously, obnoxiously ‘sleazy’ out on your coffee table/open on your laptop/etc. and if your room smells like the vip room at a ghetto strip club – sure, spray a little febreeze. but if you’re changing your sheets regularly, all should be ok. your place doesn’t have to be overly clean and organized, if anything it signals tryhard. it shouldn’t look like you put any forethought into planning to take a chick home.
OT- How do feminists go about proving the “horrors” of sexism to men? By making incredibly exaggerated sexist remarks to men, and watching as they look slightly confused and laugh.
http://www.upworthy.com/see-how-these-men-respond-when-a-woman-makes-sexist-remarks?c=apstream
They seriously think this video makes some kind of profound point about how tough it is to be a woman.
[…] By CH […]
Do the right thing! *
* It only benefits me by accident. Really.
http://www.detroitnews.com/article/20140415/SCHOOLS/304150030/Detroit-student-protests-U-M-admission-denial-argues-school-needs-more-diversity
But being blown off by a girl feels awful. In my last exchange exactly 3 months ago.. with my crazy ex gf, we had made plans to meet up after a 2 month estrangement.
She had come to my New Year’s Eve party and we had begun texting. She had proposed meeting up…then one day before that date/meet-up she texted me she couldn’t meet because of some sudden drama in her life—she was moving and it was stressful for her, her furniture didn’t fit in her new apartment and so she had to meet up with her brother to find a solution blah blah blah…Stressful, crying blah blah blah.
Her text was clearly calculated to make me feel that if I pushed further it would be a massive imposition because she was going through such a tough time. She didn’t offer any alternatives or make-up times for another meet up. I clearly wasn’t thinking straight at the time and believed her.
I’d foolishly offered some ideas which lead to “Can’t” “Can’t”.
Unknown to me at that time, she ended up going out with another guy the next night.
She later texted me that week for more attention but didn’t offer any alternatives.
I went away on my long holiday and didn’t tell her. Suddenly a few days later I got panicked calls, texts, emails—around 20 or so in 4 days asking “Where are you?” I’m so worried about you….”
I ignored. Finally I replied and asked what she wanted. “Friendship.”
Huh? She blew me off…then spent a week sending panicked calls just to be “friends”???
I found a Facebook photo of her with another guy at an event the day after her “I’m so stressed about life and can’t meet you” excuse.
I called her out on it and then told her never to contact me again.
I probably came off as very angry and I was.
But the idea she could pull something like this, manipulate me into agreeing to go out, then manipulate me into feeling sorry for her domestic situation to justify her domestic situation…then going out with this guy who she claimed to me previously was a “Friend” was pushing me into chump territory.
In this context it gave me all the justification I needed to cut her out of my life with moral high-ground.
The point here is this is a “damned if you do, damned if you don’t” situation.
To not say anything would mean you’re a chump.
To cut her out of my life was dramatic but could appear “butt-hurt”.
I share this all because “Wow” would have been a much better response. But discovering that she had canceled on me but went out with someone else the next night was something that for me couldn’t be ignored given the history.
I struggle with this situation because my game is normally tight. But with a very manipulative girl I was totally thrown off.
Now it’s been 3 months of No Contact. I’m getting my inner game back and beginning to recognize these excuses for what they are.
I had a girl tell me she couldn’t meet up for some lame reason….
“Ghey” was my reply.
If your game was normally tight, you would know the number 1 rule of game is…
ALWAYS HAVE OPTIONS
You let your options go, and so you let your game go. It sucks to hear it, but I’ve been there. You have to internalize the nature of females. They are not dependable, which means that you must ALWAYS HAVE OPTIONS.
How do you always have options?
ALWAYS BE APPROACHING
Game gets a lot of bad rap, but the fundamentals are really the only important part. Negs and all that other crap are just little tips and tricks.
The most important takeaway from game is that females are unreliable, and that you must always diversify your pussy portfolio. This diversification will lead to stability, inner peace, and success in all walks of life.
@Randy Yes. I only shared my experience because it is an extreme example of how letting your emotions get the better of you early lowers your value.
But the other important learning for anyone who follows my posts is that if you’re going to blow up…do it once…do it big and never look back.
Calling out a flake you just met is butt-hurt. Calling out an ex gf who you have a history with and who is clearly playing you requires a different type of response.
In this case NOT calling her out would have been weak.
Otherwise, I think the original post is solid.
Another example of when my game was tight. I met a flight attendant at a party. Number closed, contacted her. We set up a date for drinks the next time she was in town. She bailed with the “I’m not feeling well” excuse hours before the agreed upon meeting time.
I waited until 10 minutes AFTER that meeting time to reply: “Oh, I just got this, if we meet up again you’re buying.”
She was gushing. It was a case of over a period of several months each time I’d run into her I’d game her: push-pull, one word texts.
She even remarked “Your texts are all just grunts”.
Finally I banged her about 6 months after that flake. I continued banging her and she would chase me until she ended up quitting her flying job and settling down somewhere. Even then whenever I go through that country she meets up with me.
Those are two examples.
Although I see your point. It’s way easier to call out a girl you met once and flakes on you (and never look back (even if you are seen as butt-hurt) than an ex-gf because of the emotional connection and oneitis (been there myself too in the past in a situation that resembles yours)
@anotheronetakesthepill
I would disagree because the emotional connection is what makes the flake that much more insidious and worse. If you let that slide without drawing a clear boundary, you’re a chump–especially given my history with this woman where we seemed to always be in a push-pull. I would pull and she would push and vice versa.
In every relationship only one person can lead…if there’s a power struggle of any kind it can’t work.
Secondly, with the new girl flake…who cares. As in my example, I was able to turn the flake around by NOT caring.
In the case of calling out the girl it was also because a boundary had to be drawn and it was truly time to walk away or be walked on.
I think many guys here who aren’t in regular contact or interactions with women see things from a narrow perspective.
Game is often more nuanced. This “wow” is a great example of how to react without reacting.
In other cases a harder stance is required….but in my case since I’ve taken it…it cannot walk it back. I can’t after 4 months call back and say “Hey babe, been thinking about you…”
No.
“The most important takeaway from game is that females are unreliable, and that you must always diversify your pussy portfolio. This diversification will lead to stability, inner peace, and success in all walks of life.”
Excellent point. The parallels between managing your money and managing your pussy are so identical that they are impossible to ignore.
“But with a very manipulative girl I was totally thrown off.”
I might be a n00b to game I was careful not to let relationships become too intense. I’d make sure not to come off as needy. But I swear that I fell under my first real Oneitis’ spell. I built her up like this Dream Girl and she was so sweet, kind and beautiful. At least at first.
I’m 99% sure that Oneitis played me big time. Our first date was practically something you’d see from a 1950s Hollywood film like you see with Doris Day wrapping her arms around Rock Hudson in a sweet and feminine way. She knew what buttons to push to make me devote myself to her.
Oh, and Oneitis flaked quite often due to illness. Every time she’d postpone a date, she could hear the pain in my voice as I said “OK”.
Being out of the dating game for 15 years, I had forgotten about all the drama that goes on with dating. I would think that since I’m dating women between the ages of 25-40, that they’d be a bit more mature than those high school girls. I actually think they’re worse.
> “I found a Facebook photo of her with another guy at an event the day after her “I’m so stressed about life and can’t meet you” excuse.”
FILTHY LYING CHEATING CUNT.
> “I called her out on it and then told her never to contact me again.”
GOOD.
> “Finally I replied and asked what she wanted. “Friendship.” Huh? She blew me off…then spent a week sending panicked calls just to be “friends”???”
THANK YOUR LUCKY STARS THAT YOU ARE RID OF HER.
That it isn’t ten years from now, and you’ve had two or three children with her, and suddenly she moves out and initiates divorce-rape proceedings against you, and you’re looking at only ever seeing your children – your own flesh and blood – on alternate weekends.
Now get back to work on perfecting your Game, so that when you finally meet that extra-especially nice girl, from a good family, who would never harm so much as a hair on your head, and who fucks like a wild animal, you’ll be ready and fully prepared to become the FATHER OF HER CHILDREN.
I’ve had a girl exactly the same way.
It was a learning experience. She doesn’t crave “friendship.” She craves drama and nothing more. Would she do anything for you if you needed it? Not likely.
I think because she’s hot she was able to get away with this stuff with other guys and then slowly make the shit she pulled less shameful.
When we first started she had told me she’d had a fight with her then bf and left him in Russia and went on a trip on her own to some other country.
I filed that. She did exactly the same thing to me. When that happened I ignored her and it drove her nuts.
My mistake was engaging her again 6 weeks later. That lead no where.
I read many posts here and elsewhere about “Ex gf contacted me what should I do…”
I’ve realized that when they do this, it’s never for reconciliation it’s for the feeling that they’re not as bad as they feel.
Only someone with low self-esteem would pull this type of disappearing act then blame their guy.
Too many guys fall for the “feel sorry for poor me” act. I did…so an extreme call out was necessary when I discovered the truth.
One of the giant errors in your site is that you assume that Alpha activities solely relate to women. I’d argue that beta-=tude is often more dangerous with men than with women. Betatude begs for sadism, exploitation and disrespect. Betatude certainly works with women when not ovulating (most of the month), however, aside from being toadie to an Alpha, it rarely never works with men.
My buddy has the best Tinder/text game ever.He arranges everything as group gatherings, which makes them feel more comfortable about coming over. He gets laid, and we all get laid in the process. It’s good to have great friends.
It’s like Groupon… but with dicks ‘n’ clits.
I agree that it is very important to “keep two in the kitty” and always have plates spinning. BUT if your main focus is on the hottest girl (which it will be) then chances are it will hurt when you lose her. Maybe not as much, but I’m not sure having options helps with the pain in losing the best. What do you think.
I think you haven’t yet found your new “best”. When they’re young, dumb, and willing to make you cum, then consider them the “best”… if only for one night.
the more it “hurts” you when one flakes, the more often it will happen. A woman’s intuition isnt good for shit but it can sure as f sense the slightest neediness.
Your inner game is important here. Her loss, not yours. Adam Carolla used to talk on loveline about how breakups only suck when you dont have anything going for you in the other areas of life. Flakes only suck when your date was the only reason you got dressed.
Lastly, none of these girls are best anything. The hotter the girl, the less she contributes to society, the harder she will hit the wall, the lazier in bed she is, and the blander her personality. Even a dime is a dime a dozen.
My point is this: at some point every male and female wants to have that loving connection with another person, and for men this is ideal when it is with the hottest girl you have on your plate. If the girl is willing to be monogamous and continues to have sex with you, then sure you can spin other plates with hot girls but it will still hurt when you lose that one girl.
Honestly, I day dream about house breaking the hottest girl in my rotation. What helps me not start talking that loving connection fairy tale sht is to picture all the cocks she sees on a monthly basis. I mean really picture her getting dug out in a dirty club bathroom. That image you have in your head pretty much sums up her nature as a western woman.
She’s a hard 9 so I know she gets plenty of attention from alphas that can push the exact same buttons I push. Since physical attractiveness is the primary metric I consider when hunting iPhone buffalo, yea it hurts when I lose the hottest one. But, I’d like to define hurt as “shucks, I’ve got to walk all the way to the girl tree, which thanks to technology I’m connected to wirelessly at all times.”
You and whatever chick will be happier when you stop looking for a love connection and start looking for your main bitch.
church.
Interesting post and it’s such good timing for me to read this b/c of what happened to me yesterday. (Or maybe good timing for me to read this to implement this next time.) I’m a beta, but I’ve been talking to girls and trying to learn game. I met a beautiful, kind girl at one of my temp jobs and introduced myself, got her name and helped her learn how to work the register and so on. I also talked to her and she was smiling a lot. So, we keep chatting little by little and I finally ask her out like 3 weeks later. (I know I should of acted sooner, but wasn’t confident enough). She said yes, gives me her number the next day. Then she says I can only text her and she promises that she will respond and go out with me. That was on Sunday, I said cool and left. I text her like the next day asking if she is free to go to Dave & Busters with me Monday at 5pm. She said, yeah, awesome I will be there. Look forward to seeing you there.
It’s the day of the my first date I’m getting ready, ironing, picking out clothes, etc. The girl sends me a text saying, “I can’t stand right in front of D&B b/c I would be infringing on their business” I didn’t respond, she then sends another txt saying “let’s meet at 540pm or 6pm” I say ok, no prob which time is better for you? I get no response and just text back,”I guess I will just see you at 6pm, but if you don’t want to go, that’s cool. I commute 40 mins into Times Square from Queens, NY and get there at 5:55pm and text the girl at 6:02pm. “Hey, I’m here”
I waited outside for 21 mins and got no response from her nor did she showup, she didn’t even call to reschedule or anything. So I left and went home kind of down since I was quite smitten with her. I get home and 20 mins later I get a text from her saying, “Hey, I came at like 630pm. I hope you’re not mad.” And she she said something else in the msg, but I didn’t really pay much attention to it and just deleted it. Then I asked my older cousin for advice and he told me to keep her number and just ask her out again. I like her, but I’m not desperate enough to be treated like that and still go back. (And most likely be treated like that again or worse.) So, I deleted her number and everything, but now I have to see her at work 2 days this week. And next week and so on.
I apologize for this long ass post brothers, but I just had to tell this story. All advice and critscism are welcome. I will say that the very 1st day I talked to her and showed I liked her, she came up to me and asked me, “Do you like me?” like 4 times in front of like 4 other people. And I just kept saying, “What? What?” (I was playing dumb and was didn’t have the balls to say it.) And she walked off looking annoyed and I did like her, but I felt put on the spot in front of everyone. But, I did go to her soon after that when it was just the two of us ask her questions about herself and she smiled at me. Basically showing that I do like her. I just don’t understand why she would pretend to like me and then flake. I know she is like the 2nd prettiest girl there and she’s like an 7.5/8. And hot girls flake a lot, but why would she get so excitied to see me? I thought maybe I appeared a little more alpha then some of the other guys, b/c every night the same 4 to 5 guys wait for her to get all her stuff and then walk her to the train station. I never waited for her and just leave when I want and she always calls me “sweetie”. And keeps calling me sweet, but can’t I just transcend to alphadom and the girl I want for once?
Big picture: get to the Zen of Nopussy. You don’t need pussy. Get a life with masculine hobbies and build yourself up.
You have solid instincts to resist letting yourself be controlled by this girl. However, you still have oneitis and you need to face it and deal with it. Been there, done that and I’m a natural.
This chick was rude to ask you about your feelings in front of these other people. Call her out on it if it happens again.
Call her out on not calling you to tell you she’d be late. Don’t be butthurt, though. Just “meh.”
This chick is into you at least some. Don’t delete texts or phone nos. based on emotion. She’ll probably text you again.
Sorry forgot to put this last question in there. What should I do? Should I overlook it and ask her out again or just move on? Should I just be quiet and not talk to her or continue to talking to her like nothing happened? And when she sent me that last text msg, “Hey, I came at 630pm. Hope you’re not mad” I just deleted it and never replied.
Tried this. Doesn’t work. Then again I’m never really in this position nowadays where a girl has to lie to flake on me. So I guess the odd time out I must have really flunked out with the set that there’s no room for recovery. It’s hard to get the tingles going again if a PUA puts himself in this position. I usually extract the honesty out of her, learn from my mistakes and move on to tighter pastures. Gaming a girl after she flakes really fucks with the abundance internals.
I often want to exit interview chicks that it doesnt work out with. I rarely do since usually chicks have no idea where their tingles come from. How do you get useful information from them?
I’d like to be able to conduct exit interviews with former girlfriends as well out of curiosity. But that would require me to act beta and ask what went wrong.
When it’s over with a girl, I just move on and stay silent (usually).
Getting her to admit her lie or falter in her logistics becomes a different game for me. I’m the type to set sabotage when dealing with airheads who aren’t feeling my game. Not in a spiteful way, In a jokester way. I genuinely like to fuck with people. In a flake situation I steal her frame and amplify it further and further to the point where she feels uncomfortable, possibly angry. Since she’s trying to manipulate through empathy she’s already adopted a frame of sincerity and friendliness. So I take advantage of that and throw jabs while she tries bob and weave as the frustration grows. She can’t tell me to fuck off because she made a politician of herself when she decided to flake with a stupid text in the first place. Now tell me how is that not funny when someone is trying to bullshit his way out of something and you know damn well what the truth is.
“I often want to exit interview chicks that it doesnt work out with. I rarely do since usually chicks have no idea where their tingles come from. How do you get useful information from them?”
No chick who rejected you for not being alpha enough will EVER be honest about why she did it. And since that’s the reason for about 90% of rejections, it’s kind of pointless to ask.
I have a guy friend I really want to help (no game whatsoever) but even I can’t bring myself to be honest about why he’s unsuccessful.
And being a real man who is a proven great dad for nearly 9 years so far gets precisely ZERO alpha points. Proven real paleo-alpha characteristics–true protection for the woman (still providing for the ex wife after all of these years because (1) for the kids but also (2) a bit of loyalty to her for giving me my beautiful kids). ZERO alpha points for that.
But being an alcoholic who drinks alcohol and “parties” 5 nights a week in a fuzzy hat, who hates kids but loves tats? That’s alpha. Let me remove my wet panties, say the girls.
Fuck it.
Reread ur comment, I agree it does seem a little thirsty to give a girl you barely know a second chance after a flake. I look at reengaging a flake as a low risk/high reward activity. You already invested time in the pick up and gaming her. I even concede that one hundred percent of the time a flake is bs. But I dont mind getting a bang after reengaging even if the first time she flaked was so she could bang some other dude. Worst case scenario she sees me still pursuing her after a blow off as beta and I dont get the bang anyway. Worst worst case scenario she screen caps me being thirsty. So maybe low investment/medium risk/high reward
Dogking, ct, and Single40NewToPUA Thanks for all the advice, I really appreciate it. I really like this girl and see ct’s point of view, but my gut is telling me she will flake again b/c I’m not her number one choice. She might be meeting other guys and I bet they’re better looking and WAY more alpha than me. Most importantly, I’m just going to move on and when I see her at work I won’t look sad, hurt or mad, but I won’t talk to her either. Unless she says hi first and in the event she does I will just keep it cordial and say hello and keep it moving.
So I haven’t heard from my Oneitis since Saturday. We had gone out with her friends to a night club as a non-dating “Let’s just be friends” type of date (she had clearly friendzoned me by that point stating that the relationship had gone too fast).
I did try to hold her hand a couple of times, but she frostily pushed me away. So I start making eye contact with this pretty blonde girl half my age. We then start to talk and we go dancing as she grinds against me.
Then my Oneitis asks me to dance is clearly a bit more warm and receptive to me. I politely thank her for the dance, and then I proceed to talk to the blonde girl for about an hour more.
I come back to the booth where Oneitis and her party girl friends are sitting. Oneitis clearly has her back turned away from me looking at somewhere else. We then leave the night club and say our goodbyes.
So today, I had errands to do. She had left a few items at my place when she spent the night a couple of times. I texted her asking if she wanted her stuff back because I would happen to be in the area. I didn’t hear a response.
I don’t think I’ll make any more overtures. It’s true that I was hurting real bad as she went cold in the latter half of our relationship. I went totally romantic beta (dropped all of my other girlfriends so that created a feeling of scarcity) and that doomed any prospect of a longer relationship. I’m basically still new to the dating game, and I’ll make sure next time not to show my cards so soon.
I spoke to my counselor about my Oneitis (I’m seeing one because of a death of somebody very dear and close to me) and by the way I described Oneitis she thinks that because of her previous number of sexual partners that all relationships for her ring hollow now. I gave her my heart a bit too early and that’s why she got tired of me and went cold.
So what to make of it? Did Oneitis feel embarrassed that her LJBF date was flirting with another girl in full view of her and her friends? Is she jealous?
Your name reeks of astroturf. If you’re for real, you should work to acquire some social competence, then pick something that doesn’t immediately inspire distrust.
Fair enough, I’ve decided to adopt a new namesake.
And as far as social competence goes, I can’t be doing that badly if I’ve gotten laid quite a number of times so far.
bro I said from the beginning that the foundation you built this relationship on was wrong and unstable…you built it when you were a beta. Next her, get upper hand and find a new girl it won’t happen instantly know that
I’ve read that even the best PUAer will suffer a bout of extreme Oneitis where he’s thrown off his game.
Now that I’ve experienced it, I know how to look out for the signs. I don’t think this Oneitis is salvageable and she’s basically a lost cause at this point.
My feelings for her are now subsiding quite a bit. I can actually look back at it with good natured humor. Yeah, I did go through quite a bit of anguish but that’s helped me build a certain hard-heartedness to prepare me for the next time that I’m really into a new girl.
I was hoping gbfm would take that one
” I gave her my heart a bit too early and that’s why she got tired of me and went cold.”
I heard somewhere online, it was probably the Cheateau that a woman wants to EARN a man’s love and that if he gives it away too easily or freeliy, she won’t respect him or desire him like before. Just thought I should tell you that, but I’m probably the last person you should hear this from. B/c guys like you (Single40NewToPUA) and me are the type of guys that like a girl too quickly and get emotionally invovlved. And I think it’s b/c we wear our hearts on our sleeves with potential love interests or girls were attracted to.
And to answer your question, yes I do think you dancing and talking with the pretty blond made your oneitis jealous. From my last oneitis experience, which was last year, the girl I liked would not smile that much or talk to me that much when I was giving her all the attention in the world. She was very serious and not interested, but as soon as I “stopped liking her” I started talking to other attractive girls there and she would see that and her behavior would change.
When i was ignoring her, being cold to her and not giving a fuck and just chatting up other women, my oneitis would start complimenting me. She would call me cute a lot and she hugged me from behind on 2 different occassions right in front of customers and co-workers. My whole point is women want a man who can attract other attractive women and when they see that, they will come to you. Esp. an oneitis, but unfortunately I think the “interest” level of your oneitis is temporary when you talk to other girls. Personally, I think you should of kept talking to that blond and try to bounce her to a quick mini date like pizza and invite her back to your place to watch a movie or for a nightcap. Well, good luck bro and remember there’s plenty of fish in the sea. 🙂
–” that a woman wants to EARN a man’s love and that if he gives it away too easily or freeliy, she won’t respect him or desire him like before. Just thought I should tell you that, but I’m probably the last person you should hear this from.”
I completely agree with this. In fact, my counselor told me this. But it’s one thing to agree with something in theory, it’s quite another when you are feeling extreme anxiety when the girl is slipping away. Oneitis makes one act very foolish.
Ultimately, I had to re-experience the pain of falling for a girl to re-learn this lesson since I had been 15 years out of the dating game.
–”yes I do think you dancing and talking with the pretty blond made your oneitis jealous.”
While I was dating my Oneitis, she invited me over to her apartment for dinner. I brought her flowers and she wistfully said: “No man has ever brought me flowers before!” Not sure if that was sincere or she was pushing my romantic buttons. She said she was going to dry them out and keep them forever. And yes, I did get laid as a result of this romantic beta move. I wonder if she’s destroyed them now.
I actually wouldn’t mind if she called me in a few weeks and we could rationally discuss what had happened during our relationship. I’d be mature enough to provide a post-mortem analysis.
Maybe she was manipulating me or maybe she felt that she didn’t deserve me. She kept saying that I was putting her too high on a pedestal.
Now that I’m over the pain, I suppose I could look back on this as a pleasant memory. She was as far as I’m concerned, a fairly beautiful woman (though with a bit of a sordid past) which I got to bang anyhow. I just turned into a total pussy because of her.
– “Well, good luck bro and remember there’s plenty of fish in the sea. :)”
I now have 3 girls that I’m currently working on. I’m very nonchalant towards them and that seems to drive them crazier and crazier for me. Reason that I’m nonchalant is because I actually prefer now to spend a bit more time on my hobbies.
cant believe im gonna say this but you might wanna start with Corey Waynes ebook….
seems your speed.
What makes you suggest that book for myself and why it would be useful for me?
I’m not familiar with it at all.
its the what but not the why.
you seem interested in being told what to do vs. why it works.
he has rolled it waayyyyy back and kinda bublegummed it up.
it sounds like thats where you are right now.
“Maybe she was manipulating me or maybe she felt that she didn’t deserve me. She kept saying that I was putting her too high on a pedestal.”
This is girlspeak for “you’re too clingy/needy”.
Nah, it means he’s being a beta douche. He’s not treating her like a woman with needs. He’s letting her get away with sh1t. He’s not engaging her emotionally or physically.
This is interesting timing for me as i was just flaked out on with a message this morning by a hot woman i have been gaming on POF…would have met her for the 1st date tonite..im bummed out.
So she did her speel…blah blah sorry cant meet cause.. blah if you think you would like to meet again blah.
I just replied ‘ok ttyl’
But this post doesnt answer what is knawing at me:
1. is she legitimate?
2. is she just a typical flake like most women seem to be becoming?
3. or has she changed her mind and is not interested anymore?
Well i guess i just have to wait and see if she texts me again?…its a tough one as she conveys a traditional/ likes a man who takes charge persona, and maybe she will think i have said ‘fuck it’? But yeah, i guess if she likes me enough she will make the first move again..i will know after the weekend.
I have 2 other women to fuck so im not too butthurt..and this IM SO BUSY IM SO BUSY mentality of women these days is why i want MOAR.
POF: about as DHV as introducing yourself after crawling out of a bomb crater or fireplace chimney.
This is off-topic but thought I’d say it. I literally laugh every time I hear people say that the avg girl has a way lower number than the avg guy. If you are somewhat alpha or have a good network of friends (i.e. college) then you know the crazy slutty things that some girls do. It’s at the point where I don’t even need to ask anyone because I know from friends who some of these girls have fucked and the numbers are double digits and from personal experience. Idk it’s just hard for me to accept that girls supposedly have lower numbers than guys (maybe some alpha guys i guess)
Of course she has a lower number. It just seems higher because you’re made the mistake of counting the 5 guys who fucked her on spring break or those silly 14 one night stands she can hardly remember and Dave the drummer who bangs her every other Tuesday and those dicks she’s only sucked.
Haven’t you heard, none of these count. So man up and marry that filthy slut.
So, being a inarticulate bitch is the way to go?
I got a cancellation for a lunch from a girl because she said some meeting was running late. My response… “lame”
She then proceeded to send 3 more messages whining/explaining her situation.
Man makes video of himself scaring his easily-startled girlfriend, claims he had to stop because she threatened to break up:
http://elitedaily.com/humor/boyfriend-makes-hilarious-vine-compilation-times-hes-scared-girlfriend-video/?utm_source=FBTraffic&utm_medium=fijifrost&utm_campaign=CMfacebook
“Uh” Less emotional investment than “wow”. More ambiguous, too. Still plausibly deniable.
“10-4″ Chick probably will have to google that and will require more investment from her. No emotional investment from you and is ambiguous yet distinctive.
“…” Trite and common. Not good.
“???” Implies you care. Not good.
“meh” Uncaring sociopath if she really has a sick grannie. Dark Triad Game. Implies you don’t believe her and are calling her out without caring about it. She’ll wonder what you’re doing. I kind of like this one the best.
I also like “vid.” If she really has a sick grannie, she can send you a video of her with the grannie.
I personally would rather have a girl halfway interested in me… the ones that REALLY like you want to see you all the time and don’t give you much space, ask a million questions, etc.
HER: Sorry I can’t make it! My grandma fell and can’t get up. I have to take her to the hospital.
Sure there could be a genuine emergency but its more likely that she’s sitting with her friends having a giggle. So I still think a *humorous* – I Call Bullshit – text has a better rate of return here. So I’d send one of these…
– If you loved me, you’d leave her on the floor
– Fell? Are you sure grandpa’s not been smacking her around again
– Told you to keep her away from the sauce
Maxim XIII and XVI
Call Bullshit or Next. A woman pranked me recently at my dance bar. She is a ballet/tap/jazz instructor but didn’t tell me when she asked me to teach her country two-step. So I taught her and she picked it up very fast. I smelled a rat and called her on it. One of her friends ratted her out and she admitted the truth. I called her a cheater and said that I couldn’t believe that she did this. Then we all laughed uproariously. I still gave her the moniker, “Ringer,” which she accepted. So I taught her another dance and kept my hand on her hip with my forearm against her side. She was digging it. It would be cool to see her again, but I think that about all the ladies. XD
how about “flake on :)”
I had a recent experience with this where I responded to something
she said:
Me: “wow”
Her: “Stop hating”
That kinda trumped me but also made me laugh out lough and say “wow”
“Little spoon doesn’t make the rules” or “little spoon doesn’t tell me what to do”
seriously of course you can’t say that, but this girl was a waste of time, right?
I’m tired of this bitchiness “stop ____” being used as a command. Another example of feminism taking too far in the other direction until the pendulum breaks. Perhaps it was wrong in the 19th century for men to boss women around, but it is *certainly* wrong for a woman to boss a man around. Especially in a bitchy way like that early in a flirtation.
“Stop hating” is apparently right from the Puffed Ho list of things for bitchy girls to say.
Sometimes you can’t stay calm… a weird case happened to me a month ago, although it didnt happen with a girl I liked. I was sitting in a park near my home, and she (a 15-16 y.o girl) suddenly appeared telling me “wow what a man” (in a wanna be sarcastic voice) I told me “is that how you try pick up guys?” and she said no… then came her friend (or her little brother, the guy was literally a midget while she was normal height for a ho in my country) and the little kid told me she pissed there (where I was sitting). Insintictively I have no time for bullshit so I told him how come a midget acts so tough… she started laughing at him… after some talk with him she asked me what I was doing there and I told her (in an angry tone because of the talk with the midget’s) “what are you spying on me” and she said in a sincere tone that she’s sorry. Tried to be as calm as I could but when someone tries to AMOG me acting all tough I can’t control myself (Obviously I couldn’t beat the fuck out of him, he was a little kid half my size). Someone