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Following on the heels of archival microfiche documenting the efficacy of jerkboy charisma game in the textual wild, comes this from a reader,

I’m always amazed by how right you are with your text game advice.

One of my areas of weakness had always been my text game.  6 months after reading your blog this shit is happening.  She’s the gray and I’m the green below.  Thanks man!

Attached was this screenshot of a text word count ratio that looks very favorable for the man.

Harkening to the previous post, the take-home lesson here is not the specific wording he used in his reply, but the game concepts he upheld. In this instance, he “pushed” her away by ignoring her plea, teased her by promptly offering to watch a show she didn’t want to watch, and then “assumed the sale” by not bothering to wait for her response before suggesting — no, commanding — she meet him at his stated time.

Also beside the point are complaints that this isn’t game because “she already knows him”. Look folks, game never stops, because women’s sexual psychologies never stop functioning. You think just because some girl previously agreed to a date with you that that means you can stop acting like the charming bastardo you unloaded on her the first go-round?

Naturally, differences in the structure of your game will accompany the type of relationship you have with the woman in question. Most notably, if you and her just met in a crowded noisy venue, you’ll have to be more aggressive and intentional to seal the deal and avoid any misconstrual that you’re a boring beta or a seeker of asexual friendship. If you have known her for a few dates and a sexual or romantic relationship has yet to be nailed down to your satisfaction, then an air of relaxed aloofness will assume a larger role in your game. If you have been banging her for six months, and she’s hooked, then you’ll want to solidify the relationship (if that’s your goal) with more displays of beta provisioning.

77 Responses to “Jerkboy Charisma Game, A Series”

  1. Zombie Shane says:

    > “let’s do a shark tank night tomorrow. swing by 7:30″

    N00BS: Note that he did NOT ax her if she would like to watch the show.

    Instead, he ORDERED her to come over and watch the show.

    Ultimately, that’s what women want in their men.

    They want men of resolve.

    They want to be dominated.

    They want to submit.

    So do not ask her to do a thing: ORDER her to do it.

    [And you don’t have to be rude about it. Just make it clear that this is what is gonna happen, and then do it.]

    • Zombie Shane says:

      And obviously it just gets her hamster revving all the more faster and her nether regions all the wetter when he orders her to do what she just told him she didn’t want to do.

      • burke says:

        probably noted below too, but i read it like she is saying there were no more new episodes of shark tank to watch and she was irritated about that. otherwise i think she’d have said lol ok after he said the thing she just said no to.

        it’s a nitpick, the entirety of the approach is still great for the situation

        • Zombie Shane says:

          Also, I am not talking about being a Control Freak.

          In general, Control Freakery is for women and sodomites.

          I’m just saying: Have a dadgum spine.

          Women do not want a flaccid pushover beta schlub loser with a limp linguini noodle where his spine outta be.

          If something important’s gonna happen, then just INFORM her that it’s gonna happen.

          No pleading.

          No begging.

          No axing.

          No whining.

          Just: This is the way it’s gonna be.

          And if after all this time dating you, she’s still too much of a femcunt witch at heart, and she tries to pick a smart alecky fight with you over it, then next her ass right then and there.

    • lzozozozozozoozlz

      3 EZ STEPZ: How 2 Handle FLakesz and Flakey Flakerz in da ERA of da TEXT MESSAGE attention whorez zlzlzozozz

      dis is from hearteites blog on FLAKEY FLAKE ERA WE LIVEZ IN where everyone flakes zlzozozoozoz while da gbfm sits at home and waits for da chcix who cflaked flaked on your asssss lzozozzolzolzol:

      how 2 counter da flakey flakesz in THREE EZ STEPZ

      1. 9 PM: da gbfm sends out a mass text 2 all my ladies:

      “lotsa cocksa 4 u lzozlzlz.”

      da gbfm then gets back dozens of messages:

      lol
      wtf

      ok
      haha
      ???

      kewl
      wat?

      2. da gbfm waits and hour and sends out to everyone again:

      10 PM: “srry wrng #”

      da gbfm then gets back lotsa texts

      awwww
      lol
      too bad
      u got my hopes up
      damn you

      ur loss

      3. da gbfm then waits ’til midnight and texts to everyone:

      12 Midnightz: my place 30 min.

      den da gbfm sits back and watches the parade arriving on his door camera monitor while he watches da espn highlights and reads homer’s odyssey. ding-dog ding-dong they ring da gbfm bell one by one hoping to touch da gbfm’s ding-dong zlzozozzozololzollzo but if they are under an 8 da gbfm just ignorez & reads his boookz zlzozoolzz

      at 1 am a hot hottie shows up and da gbfm hits the buzzer and lets her up.

      da gbfm saves lotsas times and money while the betas liquor her up at the bars and da gbfm gets to hang out with homer instaead of goldidggers and douchetard boobie-men manboobz at all the clubs these days lzlzllzlzl

      PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do nottry this on your own as da GBFM needz you out there buying them drinkz all night and getting them dinnerz as i don’t want no hos eating my puizzaaa and heinekinz beerz!!!! we all have our part in this so please please respect yo!!!!! lzozolzolozzzz

      zlozozolzyeleleendiiziebenrnakified zlzozolzozooz

    • Matthew King says:

      Shark Tank fuck yeah.

  2. Waffles says:

    This site and the various commentators here have helped me through so many situations. The text game pointers have been especially on point. I look back on some of my earlier mistakes and cringe.

  3. Maya says:

    Can everyone write five things they like about CH?

    What I like:

    ♥he’s a good writer
    ♥his sense of humor
    ♥likes to help other people
    ♥romantic
    ♥good person

    [CH: There’s a penumbra of post-diddle glow wrapped around your comment.]

  4. Preston says:

    Excellent work above. I have seldom seen such an eager submission follow an outright figurative slap-down. Something about the dynamic between the two hearkens back to “bring the movies.”

    Veering off the main thrust of the article here: CH – do you care to elaborate on “displays of beta provisioning” in LTRs (either in response to this or in a future article)? I understand the Alpha-Beta-Alpha mindset as well as ‘Skittles’ and staying true to the 16 commandments – though perhaps a brainstorming of what type of beta behavior is acceptable vs not would be helpful.

    2 months into a raunchy sexual relationship (hardly counts as LT, I know), in an effort to microcalibrate my overall aloofness, I surprised her by treating her to a semi-fancy dinner. Then surprised her even more by not going for sex (I wanted to avoid the provider vibe of “dinner for sex”). Then did not return her texts for 3 days. Worked like a charm. Perhaps the beta behavior is inconsequential, as long as it’s within the overarching frame of alpha?

    [CH: It’s more accurate to say a man’s long-wave signals of beta behavior are better appreciated by a woman when the signals are issuing from alpha centauri.]

    • take her out says:

      “Then surprised her even more by not going for sex (I wanted to avoid the provider vibe of “dinner for sex”). Then did not return her texts for 3 days.”

      Fuck, that’s good.

  5. Lucius says:

    I read it differently. That she responded to his silence with a non-sequiter, that she was dismayed by lack of new episodes of shark week. And he was johnny on the spot with the TV guide. I don’t think he offered her a show she didn’t want to watch.

    • Preston says:

      Perhaps more accurately stated: “I don’t think he offered her a show she didn’t want to watch…with him.”

    • ryan vann says:

      Yeah, the texts are pretty ambiguous to me, but the writer submitted it as an example of his advanced text game. I’m guessing she has bitched about it in the past, but it is difficult to tell for sure.

    • Matthew King says:

      Perceptive.

    • Desu says:

      yeah I thought the same thing, he reacted too fast and offered what she wanted to see. it may only be a friendly TV night for him

  6. Landser says:

    “Shark tank night” – fuck yeah!

    lolz

  7. Grim says:

    CH, you think Amanda Knox is guilty??? I think she’s guilty only of (formerly) being a stupid early 20s American HB8 who was doing drugs and mudsharking and eat prey loving with the wrong people.

    • Preston says:

      The real tragedy is the effect of stress on accelerating the wall collision of a young woman who was once a solid 7.

      • Survivorman says:

        The Wall (TM) has not been kind to Amanda. It’s been what.. ~3-4yrs?
        Chopping off her hair was a *brilliant* move! /sarcasm

    • Grim says:

      CH, please tell me our government will not send this girl back to those subhuman day-goes in Italy!!!

      http://www.cnn.com/2014/01/31/world/europe/italy-amanda-knox-retrial/index.html?hpt=hp_t1

      Fuck them. They have an appellate court redetermining FACTS. They have no real legal system, apparently. This is fucked up.

      Why do these hot blooded little brown skinned day-go police and prosecutors have it out for this girl? Jealousy? Sending a message to HB8s or Americans?

      WTF.

    • ryan vann says:

      Cause enough for corporal punishment imho, and of a public and humiliating fashion. Bring back the pillory!

  8. Tilikum says:

    From the CH Twitter feed:

    “Is there anything colder than the gaze of the female psychopath?”

    what is wrong with me that it turns me on?

  9. fakeemail says:

    “Look folks, game never stops. . .”

    This is my problem, right here. I can’t sustain game indefinitely. It’s not me.

    Once I bag a chick and things are going well for a while I want to lay-off the facade. I figure we’ve had our “courting” phase and this girl likes me and should be smart enough to realize that it can’t and shouldn’t be bullshit all the time.

    She aint smart enough and things swiftly come to a close.

    Another reason why marriage is over. It’s become fucking impossible torture for a man to be “what a woman wants” ALL THE TIME. Fuck it all.

    [CH: Game doesn’t have to feel like a chore. Once you get halfway decent, it’s a lot of fun.]

    • Scray says:

      That’s your mistake. She fell in love with a man who seemed like a man. If you want to keep her, the solution is to just become that guy. You have to change yourself.

    • earl says:

      “No, people do it every day. They talk to themselves. They see themselves as they like to be. They don’t have the courage you have, to just run with it. Naturally you still wrestling with it so sometimes you’re still you. Other times you imagine yourself watching me. Little by little you’re just letting yourself become…Tyler Durden!”

      It’s not that your game gets better…it’s that you get better.

    • Kyo says:

      “Once I bag a chick and things are going well for a while I want to lay-off the facade”

      This is the equivalent ofm after you start living together, her exchanging her mini-skirts for sweatpants, packing on 10 pounds, and refusing to have sex more than once a quarter.

      We cannot demand of them what we do not demand the equivalent of in ourselves.

    • Preston says:

      I wouldn’t say “all the time” – the shit tests definitely come in greater frequency at the beginning of a courtship as she’s feeling you out and asymptotically decrease over time – though never vanish. I see it as more of a welcome challenge to not get complacent.

      • Amy says:

        Yes. The main relationship challenge is just not putting up with her shit. She’s relying on you to lower the boom when she’s being overemotional and crazy. I think a lot of guys make the mistake of trying to placate the girl when she’s unreasonable, thinking that will get her to shut up and keep her happy. It may do that very short term, but long term it’s corrosive. She’ll get worse, testing you harder and acting more unreasonable and crazy, seeing how much you will take. What really makes her happy, long term, is for the man to be “the rock” and stay in charge, which means not putting up with all her overemotional BS.

        • Glengarry says:

          Either keep dealing with a crazy person who sort of hates you (“tests you”), or move on.

    • rikard says:

      i wish this was true, personally i´ve come to terms with the fact that talking to woman is an unpleasant and boring thing i have to do if i want to get laid. so basically its work, except i dont always get paid.

    • walawala says:

      @fakeemail

      Two things from personal experience:

      1) If you let down your game, it’s because you don’t want to bang the girl anymore. I’ve just met up with girls I used to bang regularly. Now both are 40, still attractive but I’m now targeting under 33. So I tease them but don’t have to amp it up because in one case I did bang her this trip in the other she was keen to see me and hang out and that was ok because of the fact I’m not that into her. I DHV’d her, she brought me drinks when we went out and introduced me to all her friends as a high-value guy.

      2) if it feels like a chore, you have to keep going. I sometimes feel like I have nothing to say but I just reply in some fun way. or vary it.

      If a girl is giving you IOI’s she’s not going to instantly lose attraction because you replied with “yes” or “ok it’s good”.

    • Games a party. You don’t need to get up to go to a party. You up because you go’n.

  10. earl says:

    Just proof that what a woman sees in her world is just an illusion.

    Liked the nicer version of you…but comes over when the guy doesn’t play Mr. Compromise.

    In fact here’s some pearls for those who want them…ignore her judgements of you. She only cares about your actions anyway. Silence would seem to work the best when she throws out some judgement because I can’t think of a charismatic way to say “your judgements are wrong”.

  11. Anonymous says:

    need advice for when you just texting a girl for the first time. obviously you cant play the aloof card, you have to generate attraction in her to get her invested. any tips?

    • ryan vann says:

      I assume you got a number to text somehow, and it was not pulled out of the ether.

      • Anonymous says:

        i get alot of numbers from girls i make out with on dancefloor that wont sleep with me the same night, so conversation that night is minimal. im kinda starting for scratch whenever i go to text them

        • ryan vann says:

          Easy,

          Your kissing last night… am not impress. But I am willing to let you attempt to redeem thyself.

          • Anonymous says:

            thats a good line, but i should have clarified, my problem isnt with a cocky opener, its kinda keeping the whole fun attractive vibe going, i run out of material quickly and i usually get dragged into the whole boring what do you do interrogation too soon

          • Ryan Vann says:

            Seems you have a recruiting issue, not a management issue.

          • pulsotic says:

            You didn’t have suitable attraction to start qualifying, go back to basics with mystery method, and you need at least some comfort to hook her for a future meet

  12. Reservoir Tip says:

    Had some SOLID dread game going yesterday.

    There are these two girls I was seeing, but I stopped seeing one when she really wanted me to commit and went and got a bf to try to make me jealous.

    Anyway, the one I stopped seeing had a bunch if old pictures of us together, and posted them on Instagram because she missed me. She’s been texting me, and all up my ass pining over me.

    The other girl, who I actually really like, saw the picture, screenshot it, and sent it to me wanting an explanation.

    I just said, “wat about it” and she dropped it just like that.

  13. Scray says:

    This is actually good. Not because it’s laconic or anything, but there’s some good stuff going on. She talks about a show she likes. He responds to her and the specific situ. Sure, you have him assuming the sale by giving a time…but it’s calibrated. He’s giving value, too.

    It’s not some sort of sperg-manifestation of “gay…” “bring da movies…” “…”
    But it does have all of the concepts that make those other lines work in the situations they work in.

    Calibration, dudes. Calibration.

  14. Wrecked 'Em says:

    Yesterday, I watched my professional asshole friend run this by a hot girl he barely knew:

    Him: you seem sexually frustrated
    Her: what?
    Him: I think you need your ass tickled
    Her: what?!?!? (laughing)
    Him: Put your number into my phone
    Her: (puts her number into his phone)

  15. Marco says:

    ‘no episodes of shark tank :/’

    i think that means she misses the episodes, not that she doesnt want to watch it

  16. july says:

    You could tell she wasn’t happy about the show ending and Mr. Green won points for being on-the-spot with the new stuff.

    tsk tsk

  17. thwack says:

    Every woman eventually has to deal with the wall, but there are many trees along the way to it.

  18. He just made her day. Game in a deeeezzz nutshell right there fellers.

  19. @GBFM
    I want to bear your children and I’m not even gay. You are freakin’ hilarious. Hope you sell your stuff and get some payment for your crazy humor. A Fan

  20. My shark tank game is where me and a hottie go into a shark tank while the boys in the boat above are chumming the water and attracting sharks and we try to do it without getting a limb bitten off.

  21. @earl
    “because I can’t think of a charismatic way to say “your judgements are wrong”.”
    Agree and amplify.

  22. Scray says:

    “Weightlifting is good argument against “genes control all” people. Yeah, not every man can get swole, but he can get bigger.”

    So, anyone have any info as to why the phenotype isn’t the real marker of evolution? That’s the only thing that seems to count — who cares if you have a great genetic foundation if the outward expression is garbage.

    http://healthland.time.com/2012/03/07/how-exercise-can-change-your-dna/
    “More genes were turned on in the cells taken after the exercise and the participants’ DNA showed less methylation, a molecular process in which chemicals called methyl groups settle on the DNA and limit the cell’s ability to access, or switch on, certain genes.”

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-25156510
    “Experiments showed that a traumatic event could affect the DNA in sperm and alter the brains and behaviour of subsequent generations.”

    Seems to be some evidence of this….

    And why getting to the gym, going out moar™, etc. do help increase your fitness.

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