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There are those who doubt the efficacy of game on the premise that all important personality and behavioral traits, including those vital to attracting women, like charm, wit and a large, throbbing ego, are determined at birth. They don’t accept the idea that a man can change himself for the better, or the notion that genetic endowment is probabilistic rather than deterministic.
Although it’s wise for “nurture firsters” to admit the limits of their ideology and concede that the gene determinists have a point and have been heretofore cut off from the national conversation on matters of public policy, the latter have their advocates who also push their theory of everything too far. For instance, we know that men can influence their behavioral outcome and even their hormone levels by adopting “power poses”; that is, standing or sitting with the mien of an alpha male. This is hard proof that “genes” and predispositions can be dampened, or amplified, by proactive behavioral changes. It is also proof that at least one aspect of game, as the term is understood to mean learned and applied charisma, does work to alter women’s perceptions of men’s mate value.
Now there is more ♥♥♥ scientific evidence ♥♥♥ lending validity to another core concept of game: faking it till you make it works.
People do transform their lives, every day. But for the most part they don’t do it by relying on willpower. The key, it turns out, is to simply start behaving like the person you want to become. Instead of wondering, What should I do?, imagine your future, better self and ask: What would they do?This approach works because of the rather surprising way that our brains form self-judgments. Numerous experiments have demonstrated that when it comes to forming beliefs about our own character and proclivities, we don’t peer inward, as you might expect; instead, we observe our own external behavior. If we see ourselves carrying out a particular action—whatever the actual motivation—our self-conception molds itself to explain that reality.
In one experiment, a researcher asked a group of subjects to take part in a bogus experiment and allowed them to win a sum of money. Afterward the researcher went up to the subjects and told them that he’d had to use his own paltry funds to subsidize the experiment; apologizing, he asked if they wouldn’t mind giving the money back, so he could continue his research. A second group of subjects performed the exact same bogus experiment and won the same prize money—but weren’t asked to give the money back. Finally, all of the experimental subjects were asked to subjectively rate the researcher’s likeability. It turned out that the ones who’d given back their prize money liked him a lot better. The reason: in order to explain our behavior to ourselves, we have to make assumptions about our own proclivities. I gave the guy money, the subjects subconsciously reasoned, so I must have liked him.
Likewise, the most effective way to move toward change is to act like you’ve already achieved it. Don’t worry about playing mind-games with yourself. Don’t worry about affirmations. The way to become a fit person is to act like one. I’ve always found that the hardest part of exercising—the only hard part, really—is putting on my sneakers. Once they’re on, there’s pretty much a 100 percent chance of getting some form of workout done. Why else would I have these shoes on?
You are a ladies’ man. Start acting like it, and you will in fact become the ladies’ man ladies love.
Obviously, you can’t change your internal reality overnight. But act out the change you want, and day by day, the weight of evidence will become undeniable. Before long, the person you pretend to be becomes the person that you are. In one experiment, researchers recruited subjects who said they wanted to learn one new habit, and asked them perform the new behavior every day. After 60 days, most of them rated the newly learned habit as effortless to perform. What had once been a desired change was now an accepted reality.
What had once been a beta male, was now an alpha male reality.
Game is like any other self-improvement endeavor. You “assume the pose”, you practice it relentlessly, and you make it a habit, like brushing your teeth. If you had never picked up a toothbrush, your teeth would be rotting and falling out today. But you ignored your naturally lazy ways, picked up a toothbrush and used it everyday, until it became habitual and second-nature. You stopped thinking about brushing your teeth, and now you have a gleaming row of choppers as a reward. It’s the same with learning the habits of applied male charisma that women can’t resist. You actively incorporate the trappings of alpha male behavior and attitude into your life until it becomes a real part of you, and then you have a gleaming row of sexually aroused women as a reward.