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Still Playing Games

I had a date with a 29 year old.

Remember that number:  29.

She texted me 15 minutes before the date to say she’ll be late, so I arrived even later than my usual 10 minutes late. When I walked in the bar, she was making an obvious show of enjoying the flirtatious attentions of two men sitting on either side of her. When we sat down at an outdoor table she told me how this seating arrangement would “discourage me from putting my hands all over her”. She claimed she couldn’t recall where we first met or what I said to her. She said she only dated men who paid for dates. She told me she gets bored easily*. The first question out of her mouth was “Are you a player?”. Shit test after shit test after shit test. Shit infinitum.

So I did the only thing a normal, reasonably well-adjusted man with a sense of personal dignity would do — I amped up my game to 11 and showed her the time of her life. I told her great stories that made her laugh, I touched her to get her comfortable with what would happen later, I pushed her away gently when she tried to give me a hard time, I qualified, I backturned, I cut short her boring conversations, I tapped into her emotions, I bounced her to new venues, I future projected, I ran the Love Test* (poon patented), the Cube, and Marry Fuck Kill. I read her palm. We psychoanalyzed other couples together. I explained the significance of her digit ratio. I danced with her on the street.

I drew her into my world and out of hers.

I took her home and culminated the night with hours of torrid, sweaty, passionate, body-shaking pornstar fucking lovemaking…

…and then I deleted her number.

I don’t care how hot you are, if you think you can get away with playing the same flaky, retarded, annoying female head games at 29 that you played at 22 you are sadly mistaken. Life is too short for your delusions of grandeur. Find a needy beta who will lap up your runny shit.

Last night was fun.

*Anytime an American girl tells you she “gets bored easily” you should immediately scratch her off your potential girlfriend list. I am saving you a lot of headaches with this advice.


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