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da GBFM lzzzzlzzl™ slams the terse poetical verse and wins this week’s COTW.

instagram was invented
to capitalize
on the free butts and boobieszizi
women were
programmed
to share with
the world

once upon a time
civilization saw that
a womenz buttz and boobz
were for husband
and that a girlz could not
share her buttz and boobz
with teh worldz
as her father owuld not
let her

dat was long agaoznz

lzozoo

I really like that wistful coda, especially the clever formulation of “ago” which could be confused for “agonies”.

33 Responses to “Comment Of The Week: These Butts And Boobies Were Made For Gawking”

  1. Anonymous says:

    Sunday’s in #SouthFlorida 💙

    A photo posted by Bruna Lima (@xoobruna) on

  2. […] Comment Of The Week: These Butts And Boobies Were Made For Gawking […]

  3. Anon7 says:

    So, I guess there’s a choice. Restrict butts and boobs of women to husbands in lifelong marriage, and have civilization… Or, let women share their butts and boobs with whatever tingles, and let civilization fall by the wayside.

    Got it.

  4. ng85 says:

    Back in the early days of Facebook I came across the profile of a girl I went to college with, but had never actually met. One of her past profile photos was of her in only her underwear. About a month later my roommates and I threw a party and this girl showed up. A roommate introduced me to her – I didn’t need the introduction, though, I knew who she was, and I knew what her midriff looked like before she even knew my name.

    In the days before the internet the only way you could see a girl in her underwear or naked was to know her and physically be with her. Now through the power of social media and female attention whoring you can see what used to be private moments broadcasted for the whole world.

  5. PA says:

    And then there is the classic GBFM poem that begins with something like (my spelling may be off) “to all ye cat ladies and fanboyzz I luvss you too”

  6. Blessent says:

    And “owuld” could be confused for “owned.”

  7. Greg Eliot says:

    Definitely a worthy addition to the man’s already-swolled Greatest Hits list.

  8. Twitter for retards.

  9. Tim says:

    Hoping CH comments on this at some point this week:
    http://jezebel.com/is-it-selfish-for-a-woman-to-declare-that-shes-done-wit-1693419066/+marchman

    [CH: the woman who claims to have a man eat her out for nothing in return? it’s a bitterbitch try-hard feminist troll. no such thing is happening. she’s prolly a fatty who’s pissed that no men want to fuck her they just want to stuff her face for a few seconds until they unload.]

    • Tim says:

      This comment section ain’t big enough for the both of us

    • Anon says:

      [CH: … she’s prolly a fatty…”]

      You don’t say!

      Meet Alison Stevenson : http://www.missionpositionlive.com/2014/06/12/lineup-for-june-19th/

      [CH: whoomp dere it is!]

      • Bear says:

        Yep – she’s a disgusting one. The thought of that fatty squirting in the face is enough to make me dry heave

    • corvinus says:

      Either that she found some omega willing to do the job. Yuck.

    • Hosswire says:

      In a previous existence before I decided to be a man & earn money, I spent some time in the LA standup comedy scene & have been subjected to this writer’s “act” on several occasions.

      Like all the alt-comedy losers, her comedy is basically Cultural Marxism talking points steeped deeply in angry snark & sour grapes envy of attractive winners.

      As a (technical) female in a 10-to-1 omega-to-landwhale social milieu, she adds the haughtiness of a 3 who gets treated like a 9.

      It hurts.

      If any dudes are eating her out it is only in the hopes that her thunder thighs will completely seal his ears & protect him from hearing her grating yammering.

  10. JT says:

    One Cock Rule. A song for the ages. Love the Christian rock look.

  11. earl says:

    Is that why smartphones with cameras were invented too? It takes women 5 seconds to snap a photo of the necessary parts and upload them to the social media avenue of her choice.

  12. anon dudebro says:

    Bishes be advertising their goods to as many potential buyers as they can aka attention whoring

  13. earl says:

    A woman’s body used to be for her husband and children…now it is just for her.

  14. GBFM(TM)z Iz alraidy composings my cunrtzgyulesions on da CUMINTZ OF DA WEEEK prize but da Lucius praymageurly disjected da commentz postings now I need a wetwipe lzlzozlzlz

    hey GBFMz!! I hope da lastest new GreatBooksForMen(TM) bloggas opens soon. or else da Sony Recurds will promost ur Gratest Hits cumpilyetion or da Doher Theriff editziones wel publish your selected poemtries poetries poems novelties of dA GBFM!!!

    omgz hey GBFM!! I licke da Dovher theritf but da fiancee Dover editizones like da old sceance books smell so good n da spines dey never bereak! Dey shud poblish yur Collacted Weurkse an I woold bye them aal!!

    • Greg Eliot says:

      A lot of guys try to imitate us,
      But the original is still the greatest.

      – The In Crowd

  15. TSmash says:

    “This adds to a growing body of evidence that beauty is not entirely arbitrary, or ‘in the eyes of the beholder’ as many in mainstream social science believed, but rather has a coherent adaptive logic.” -http://www.chron.com/life/healthzone/article/Blame-biology-for-mens-love-of-booties-UT-study-6155776.php

  16. No says:

    Seeing that I am going back to my conservative Christian roots after years of living like a lost heathen, I would have to say that I agree with this 100%. Women have been throwing themselves at me for sex since then. I’m sure it will take some time for me to find one I can trust.

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