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Email #1

Southern Man writes,

Sunshine Mary is reviewing a book in which the authors (both women) propose that the five core needs of a woman are:

to be cherished by a man
to be protected by a strong man
to rescue a man
to be sexually alive
to escape reality

We are of course skeptical of any advice for women written by women but this list doesn’t look too bad. How would it fare under the harsh light of the Chateau dungeon?

Heaven forfend, the Chateau is not a dungeon good sire! It is a temple. With a dungeon.

It’s natural and justifiable to be suspicious of romantic advice from women. As CH has explained at length before, the predominantly visual component of women’s attractiveness precludes them from having to grasp too much bowel-shaking reality. Men, however, can’t just apply makeup and slip into a slinky dress to get scads of attention from the opposite sex; men must learn what makes women (and competitor men) tick if they want a decent shot at sex and love.

Nevertheless, there are those rare fair flowerings of insight from the passive sex. The list above compiled by “Sunshine Mary” distinguishes itself by avoiding the flagrantly shallow and self-serving pretty lies that are the stock in trade of most of her sistren. But like most female advice, a heaping helping of contextual hedging is necessary to make any use of it.

Yes, women want to be cherished by a man… an alpha man. And they don’t want to be cherished too soon, too often, or too egregiously.

Yes, women want to be protected by a strong man… who makes them wet. And they want that protection in small doses, before it lurches into possessiveness.

Yes, women want to rescue a man… from his own jerkboy sexiness.

Yes, women want to be sexually alive… but that’s a symptom, not a cause, of the kinds of men to whom they freely give their love.

Yes, women want to escape reality… no qualification needed.

My advice… take women’s sex and romance advice with a flat of salt. Even the well-meaning ones.

***

Email #2

A reader channels Michelle Pfeiffer in Dangerous Minds,

40$ up for grabs in case I find your advice good enough.

Disqualification noted.

I’m 25 years old and I’ve only recently discovered game, but already found a wide range of instances where even just a little game makes a huge freaking difference. I’m still new and grasping basics, but the sex life with the wife has improved significantly. Yes, I have a wife and child already. Trying to get the nuclear family thing going to keep western civilization outside of America running (you’re all fucked already).

Anyway, long story short, I have to get a job as a temp at a junior high-school to support my family. No other options available. The school isn’t one of the worst, around 75/25 white/other. I want to be prepared for troublemakers however, so I read some about AMOG’ing, but all examples are in bars (naturally).

Chateau, how to deal with annoying brats, trying to take a swing on the alphatemp? Examples highly appreciated.

A physical swing? From 13 year olds? Sounds like juvie instead of junior high.

This is perhaps beyond even the cosmic ken of the all-seeing id of CH, but one thing I can pass along is what I remember my alpha teachers behaving like when they had to deal with a class badass (*innocent look*). One such teacher used to feign obliviousness to the distracting student’s antics as he strolled along the aisles formed by our chairs, and then in a swift movement and without warning would send his pointer stick crashing down on the offending rapscallion’s desktop with an eardrum-breaking crash, saying not a word in the aftermath but what was spoken by his glaring eyes. That usually did the trick.

If you prefer the subtler approach, try dunce caps (a comic trope that needs renewed life), making the loser “L” sign on your forehead, quoting an updated Dean Wormer’s classic “fat, dorky, and stupid is no way to go through life son”, or pimp slapping. CH takes no responsibility for any helicopter parent’s wrath which may be incurred by pursuing the above tactics.

***

Email #3

A refreshingly self-aware reader would like some tips on how to improve his anti-flake artillery. His Tinder/text replies are on the right (if it wasn’t obvious).

Passing along a tinder/text convo that ended in a flake. Fully aware that she never hooked very hard, if at all. But she gave a lot of shit tests which you might find interesting

Anyway the convo is for your amusement. For me, I am wondering if you have any tips for me as a 27 yr old w/ girls who are under 21 (can’t take to bars). Thanks and please dont use my name/email in anything.

reel… reel… reel….

damn! an old shoe!

My first take: You didn’t answer her shit tests hard enough. You were too forgiving. You started tossing in “fun” routines before you had energized her curiosity. That’s why your routines and leading questions fell like a led zeppelin. Also, you qualified her to soon. “You seem cool” should only be reserved for girls who have shown real effort to seem cool to you. But I think you know all this.

By the way, girls sometimes unintentionally drop clues that they’re liable to flake. “We’ll see if it works out” is one such pre-flake clue. The tiny clause “we’ll see” is one of the worst things you as a man will hear from a woman. She’s so noncommittal she can hardly contain her ennui.

To answer your question, think about what excites under-21 girls. What excites them is what over-21 men do that men their own age don’t or can’t do. Backstage passes. Shows. Artsy house parties. Introductions to movers and shakers. Cultural or urban nooks and crannies to which only older men can give her access. Yes, bars too. Ice cream? No. That’s a date you have with a girl you’ve been fucking for a long time.

I don’t think the problem is your uninspired venue-choosing algorithm. She’d have been happy to go to a bar with you if she was sufficiently intrigued by your company. Never blame a flake on a logistical imperfection that could just as readily be blamed on a dearth of excitement. If a girl desperately wants to meet you, a crusty public bathroom can suffice.

***

Email #4

A reader broods,

I have a question re: men’s looks. I know this isn’t as important as things like social proof and attitude but the thing is, where I’m not considered ugly, I’m also not very masculine-looking; I have quite feminine facial features and I’m very thin (working on this). Men who self-identify as “ugly” typically still have masculine features, just not in very good proportions. I, on the other hand, have decent proportions but not very masculine features. In terms of objective measurements like symmetry and proportion I’d say I was a 6, but I wonder: does having a “baby face” count against me, and how much? And how, physically-speaking, do I counter this? Should I play up an effeminate angle (not really my preference), or try to defeat it in some way (I also can’t grow decent facial or chest hair yet despite having very hairy legs — thanks mom and dad!)?

You’re thinking too much about this, like a little girly-woman with a little girly-hamster. Can you change your face? No. Can you approach more women and try to be more charismatic and challenging? Yes. If you do what you can theoretically do instead of complaining about what you cannot possibly do, you’ll meet women who will either love your baby-face or who will make up rationalizations for loving your face when it’s really your attitude they love.

About the only practical advice I could give you regarding your face is to abide the maxim “contrast is king”. Women will be expecting a trustworthy, genial fellow when they meet your baby-face; they’ll be pleasantly shocked when you flash your jerk pass.

On the other hand, I suppose you could go the plush beta orbiter route and aim for the bang circa 2023.

***

Email #5

The spring must bring out the brooders. Ohiomega laments,

Hi, liege. Imagine a man had taken your DMV test and received a very low score–almost everything about him was subpar in terms of its ability to help him snag snatch. How could he most efficiently go about improving his lot? What is the order of operations, so to speak, of male improvement?

Ok, this may go against conventional pickup doctrine, but the *quickest* path to improving your lot is through the weight room. Squats, deads, bench, pull-ups. We’re talking fast, right? In two months, you’ll feel manlier and you’ll look manlier. Game ROI is pretty quick too, but in my experience nothing will boost your outlook like a month or two of hard lifting. Don’t worry about “getting hyooge”. That’s not the point. Attitude adjustment is the point.

Now, if we’re talking about *total* ROI, rather than quickest, you’ve gotta hit the field and apply the core game principles on real live women. Efficiency-wise, that means:

Get rid of crutches, aka loser male friends, who are unintentional or otherwise obstacles to you walking up to women to meet them for eventual copulation as the good lord intended.

Find someone who knows how to dress. Emulate that person.

Keep a few negs, a few conversation starters, a few generic text replies, a few juicy alpha male movie quotes, and a few psychological games in your memory bank for instant retrieval. Trawl the CH archives for these.

Be a good boy scout and prepare for every woman to shit test you.

Have a pre-planned “date night activity list” in your head, which you will use for just about every woman you meet. This means you know beforehand you will take the girl from Venue #1 -> Venue #2 -> Home/Venue #3, and you will know which drinks you’ll get and who works there, as well as transportation options and distances from your 150-count bedsheets. Confidence is a side effect of tight planning.

Learn to engagingly tell one story from your life that makes you look good. Frame it in such a way that it seems you are reluctant to tell her, but oh well, she seems really interested.

Reader Mailbag entries are piling up. Expect some more in the coming weeks.

110 Responses to “Reader Mailbag: It’s Not The Venue, It’s You”

  1. […] Reader Mailbag: It’s Not The Venue, It’s You […]

    • Zombie Shane says:

      TXT boy was being way too nice.

      An Alpha does not ASK of a woman.

      An Alpha ORDERS a woman.

      If you are still thinking in terms of, “Would you like to” or “Do you wanna” then you are nothing but a sniveling groveling beta herbling manboob loser.

      You need to completely rework your frame of mind, which will in turn be reflected in a completely new Frame of your Game.

      So that “Would you like to” becomes “Meet me at” and “Do you wanna” becomes “I will pick you up at”.

      Never forget: YOU ARE THE PRIZE. Not she.

      • “Heaven forfend, the Chateau is not a dungeon good sire! It is a temple. With a dungeon.”

        IT’s TRUES!! Sometines when da GBFM get lonely i go down to da dungeon and hang out with da gimp. It callsz itself Dalrockas zlzolzolzolzolzololz.

      • Harland says:

        Yeah, well, Mr Alpha, a lot of us are not natural that way and can’t pull this sort of shit. If you’re so damned alpha, what are you even doing wasting time on an advice column for betas? All you’re doing is uselessly listing what happens when you arrive at the goal. Yay. What people like me need is *how to get to that goal*.

        I’m so sick of these “an alpha doesn’t need blah blah blah” posts. Fucking unhelpful as hell.

        • APL says:

          “what are you even doing wasting time on an advice column for betas?”

          Wow, touchy!

        • Zombie Shane says:

          > “If you’re so damned alpha, what are you even doing wasting time on an advice column for betas?”

          Trying to get you little cowards to man the fuck up and put some white buns in white bitches’ ovens so that Western Civilization doesn’t vanish into extinction.

          Now go work on your frame of mind, and let it be reflected in the frame of your Game: YOU ARE THE PRIZE.

          You do what you want to do.

          She is your follower.

          You are her leader.

      • haunted trilobite says:

        Someone besides the ykw needs to compile zs’ posts. Playa’s an inner game repository

      • Suburban_elk says:

        This is right of course. “Do you want to” and “Would you like to” is supplicating essence. An old school man of the 50s might have said,

        I’ll be at the theatre tonight and expect your company. I will be back at 8.

        Or if that is too upscale,

        Get your ass down here.

        Be that guy from last century.

      • matt says:

        Speaking of being Alpha, I need some advice. I recently started an account on POF and made it super asshole-ish after having no success with a few “nice guy” profiles over the years. Knowing that women love to defend their stupid views, I made a profile bashing a bunch of shit the typical woman strongly believe in (astrology, psychics, and so on and so forth) in order to get a rise and therefore a response. Nothing happened for the first two days but today I got a message from an insanely hot girl, like burn the tip of your cock fucking her hot. It read “Came here to say that I think you’re being unnecessarily mean. Although I agree that most of those things are bogus, the section is called ‘About Me’ – that’s *you*….” How the hell should I respond?

        • Cortesar says:

          Do you believe in physics?
          I carefully read your post and understood your predicament
          I am of the opinion there is only one way out, you have to kill yourself
          a small step for you, a huge one for humanity

          • matt says:

            Shit wow that’s pretty harsh man. I There’s nothing worse than being an apologetic, pandering pussy but that seems like it’s taking it to another extreme. You really think that will work?

          • Cortesar says:

            Le vent l’emportera
            Tout disparaitra
            Le vent nous portera

    • Zombie Shane says:

      #4, little boy face, needs to remember this: When all your contemporaries are 50 going on 65, and can no longer score with any pre-menopausal chicks, whereas you are 50 going on 35, and can still score with chicks who have abundant fertility left in their wombs, then you will finally understand why The Good Lord made your teens and your twenties so difficult for you.

      It may take a while to get there, but, eventually, payback will be a Bitch for the dudes who, at 18, already looked like they were 38.

      • thwack says:

        Baby face Nelson = public enemy #1

        • Zombie Shane says:

          There’s no question but that it sucks to be a baby face when the other dudes start showing five o’clock shadow at the age of 17 or 18.

          But if you’re a baby face, then your time will come.

          Trust me.

          Just keep lifting the weights and getting in the cardio and working on lowering your voice [so that it doesn’t squeak all damned the time – bitches love dudes with deep voices – and voice work, even if it’s just singing in the shower and in the car, does pay off in spades] and keep getting straight A’s in all your courses.

          The hard work WILL pay off.

          It just takes longer for you.

          And when the hard work finally does pay off, the five o’clock shadow dudes will all be bald, but you’ll still have a full head of hair.

          And more pussy than you can shake a stick at.

          Trust. Me.

          • sciences with lisps says:

            Babyface doesn’t always equal youthful good looks later in life. I was a cutey-poo babyface in my teens and early twenties, and then I started going bald in my mid twenties. Now I’m in my thirties and quite bald, and people often estimate my age in the mid forties. So I keep it shaved — at least it makes me look more masculine.

        • thwack says:

          Pretty BOY Floyd

      • leeminh0 says:

        “Putin is positioning Russia as Christian traditionalist standing against paganizing West”
        -Ok , first I am Buddhist so I don’t really believe it, but many Christian sites have actually identified Russia as the biblical country of Gog and Magog, because many clues such as is north of Israel, so I wouldn’t see Russia as the Christian saint

  2. Da GBFM is writingz a book in which the authors (both women) propose that the five core needs of a woman are:

    to be cherished by a man while receiving alpha fucks & beta bucks
    to be protected by a strong man while receiving alpha fucks & beta bucks
    to rescue a man while receiving alpha fucks & beta bucks
    to be sexually alive while receiving alpha fucks & beta bucks
    to escape reality while receiving alpha fucks & beta bucks

    lzozoozolzo

    • EHY EHATRYEISTE! HEATRIETSSES! D A GBFM HAS DA SAME QUESTIZONZ!!!

      I have a question re: men’s cocks. I know this is far more important than things like social proof and attitude but the thing is, where I’m not considered small, I’m also not very mid-sized even; I have quite large cockas features and it’s very thick (she’s working on this right now, giving me a hand job as it won’t fit in her tight pusysysyys). Men who self-identify as small typically still have masculine features, just not in very good proportions. I, on the other hand, have huge proportions but not very feminine features. In terms of objective measurements like symmetry and proportion I’d say I was a foot long, but I wonder: does my cock having a “baby face” count against me, and how much? And how, physically-speaking, do I counter this? Should I play up an effeminate angle with my large dangle (not really my preference), or try to get her to eat it in some way (I also can’t grow decent facial or chest hair yet on the tip of my cock, despite having very hairy legs — thanks mom and dad and my real dad too!)?

      Patiently awaiting your response,

      Da GBFM

  3. sartaglo says:

    “Core needs” implying she’ll die without them lzozoolzl

  4. Bob Wallace says:

    I had a teacher in the sixth grade who turned out to be a model and mentor for us. He was an ex-Marine. The first thing he said to us was, “I will treat you with respect if you treat me with respect.” He never had a problem with us.

    One of my friends, who was a mercenary and fought in Rhodesia, told me the same thing.For a while he was head of security in a bad area, and told every pimp and dealer in the area, “I will treat you with respect if you treat me with respect. I will not intrude on your business if you don’t intrude on mine.”

    Again, no problem, ever.

    That’s how I deal with kids and adults, and have had very few problems. Be upfront, right at the beginning.

    • truth! every date beginss wit

      “i willz treat u with respectsz if you socka my losta cockas!” lzozolzloz

      • Bob Wallace says:

        I was not talking about women. I can charm older ones, such as the 85-year-old who insisted I say please to her. I took her hand, said, “Pretty please with sugar and strawberry on top,” and after that smiled whenever she saw me.

        Younger one, yeah, they can be charmed, too. But these days, many of the younger ones…they don’t know anything. The same with younger guys…which is why they read the Manosphere for pointers because their fathers didn’t do their job.

        By the way, I never use the word, “Alpha.” Those who do, aren’t.

        • wat is a fatherz? is dat where u have 2 go when you haven’t gone far enoughz? fartherz? zllzolzolzo

          • thrust says:

            Yeah as a bouncer I vibe the same way.

            One of my go to lines is: “don’t give me drama – I won’t give you drama.” Proper tone/eye contact/hand expression, and she works quite well.

          • Zombie Shane says:

            How did your football coach treat you when you were in high school?

            Would you talk smack to him?

            In junior high, one of the niggers on the team [who soon thereafter went off to reform school and then to prison, never to be heard from again] was talking some smack to the head coach, and coach went after him with the full intention of literally killing him, and the asst coach had to wrestle him to the ground so that the poor little nigger boy wouldn’t die.

            At least not that day.

          • thwack says:

            Story sounds fake.

          • Zombie Shane says:

            Sorry to disappoint you thwack, but it’s all true.

            The weird thing is that I can remember the little nigger’s name, but I can’t remember the white head coach’s name.

            BTW, the asst coach who held him back was black.

        • mcg says:

          You’re a fucking dwarf, dude. It will take more than a smile to get with any chick, even the old far grandmas.

    • Peter Connor says:

      Yes, I have quite a bit of experience with #2. Assuming you are big and strong enough to back it up, just order the kids around with an alpha attitude and a look (and intent) that if you mess with me, I will hurt you. Never had a problem.

  5. dickmojo says:

    To the author of email #5: also, get full sleeve tattoos on your arms. Get a sharp edgy haircut and keep it sharp by going back to the same hairdresser every 3 weeks. Get massage and acupuncture every week and take herbal medicine, in addition to the supplements you take for your weightlifting activities. Get a twitter account and try to write a new cocky/funny joke on it every day. Finally, treat one cute girl/some cute girls you know like your little sister, and never try a move on them. Even turn down their moves on you, tell them you think she’s adorable but you don’t see her in that way. She will become the most rock solid social proof for future nights out etc.

    • Christopher Yeabsley says:

      Lol acupuncture.

      Get your stars read, or just follow the astrologer in the newspaper.

      Remember; if alternative medicine worked- it wouldn’t be alternative, it would just be medicine.

      • thrust says:

        Fuck sleeve tats. try hard

        • Anonymous says:

          Plus the girls attracted to them are skanks.

        • haunted trilobite says:

          I was mulling over this today and thought: who better to answer it than our very own tinfoil hat wearing zombie shane. What in the name of all things normal has happened to our impressionable white middle class and priveleged youth? Every single one is twatted up to the 9s. It’s an eyesore

        • haunted trilobite says:

          It’s an offence to the eyes to see what may once have passed for a pleasant looking woman now disfigured beyond redemption. And you know the only reason she has it is in an attempt to raise her SMV (slutty mudshark value), and so the next bad boi whose name she doesn’t even know is p&ding her he’ll have something to look at. As gbfm says it’s a guarantee she’s been desouled and her SMV is 0. Monarch has seriously done a number on these impressionable schotzim. We are living amidst depravity

      • Gro Haila says:

        4 Real? LOL.

      • matt says:

        The number of girls who believe in that sort of nonsense is extraordinarily high. In my beta days, I would just pretend to agree or refrain from expressing my disagreement. Now I’m using my utter contempt for those beliefs to my advantage. When she says how astrology and alternative medicine and “Eastern methods” are awesome just go on a tear but playfully. Gets her going and creates a nice, productive tension.

  6. […] Read more: Reader Mailbag: It’s Not The Venue, It’s You […]

  7. ray says:

    “men must learn what makes women (and competitor men) tick if they want a decent shot at sex and love.”

    No they don’t. When females started to take interest in me, around age thirty, I knew almost nothing about their strategies and schemes and desires, but had no trouble attracting them.

    [CH: assuming you aren’t #coolstorybro-ing, what you did naturally required more effort than what pretty girls have to do naturally. you may not have had conscious awareness of your SMV-enhancing efforts, but your DNA did.]

    They were attracted to accomplishment, exactly at the point I started to grow into actual manhood.

    [accomplishment is sexual attractiveness by proxy.]

    Nothing whatsoever to do with my awareness of femininity or modern female behavior.

    [your blindness is not your gene’s blindness.

    rest of your comment snipped for toxic levels of trollishness.]

    • Zombie Shane says:

      I don’t know how old you are, but guys like Heartiste, in the big Blue City Corporate/Gubmint/NGO racket, are seeing a new kind of cuntish personality which is simply insufferable.

      I live in a University town, and I see it in some of the younger ones, and, absent Game Theoretic tactics, these little hate-filled cunts can be so God-damned cuntish that you’d wanna wring their God-damned necks with your bare hands [if you didn’t know that you just need to hard-neg them instead].

      And just wait til you have your first encounter with one of these cunts when her pitbull [which she is completely physically incapable of handling] lunges at you with its fangs dripping.

      I’m talking about a murderous rage which is going to fill your veins.

      So if you haven’t yet crossed paths with the cuntish ones, then:

      A) Thank your lucky stars, and

      B) Don’t dis guys like Heartiste, who are forced to interact with them, all day long, every day.

  8. little spoon says:

    Hearts, in the spirit if this post, I have emailed you something important to me (and potentially valuable to you). Please see it.

    Thanks!

  9. Tilikum says:

    “To answer your question, think about what excites under-21 girls. What excites them is what over-21 men do that men their own age don’t or can’t do. Backstage passes. Shows. Artsy house parties. Introductions to movers and shakers. Cultural or urban nooks and crannies to which only older men can give her access. Yes, bars too. Ice cream? No. That’s a date you have with a girl you’ve been fucking for a long time.”

    CH on fire.

    lesson: get interesting…. fast.

  10. Will says:

    Chateau Heartiste I have a question for you that would benefit everyone here in some way or another b/c this is a challenge that striving-to-be-alpha males (who are looking for LTRs) come across veryyyy frequently. The obstacle is this:

    How do you develop a relationship with a girl who is in a “different stage of life as you”. This is typically seen when men date younger women (i.e. 27 yr old dating 20 yr old etc.). You can go on dates in the park together and you can eat together and hang out together etc. However, there’s always that “off” feeling of yeah we like each other but we’re just in different places in life. Sometimes it’s that the man wants to be serious, sometimes it’s the girl wants the exclusivity. But, especially with younger women they want to be (and probably should be) partying and doing college things (at least subconciously) etc. This is not the ideal society–I know. But, this is reality today.

    So, my question is this: Should you refrain from becoming exclusive with young girls? No one has been able to accurately pinpoint the correct way to handle younger women that are probably in a “different stage of life”. But it’s important for men to learn how to solidify successful relationships with girls at this age.

    • Jubei Kibagami Wanabei says:

      See Preventative Medicine on Rational Male.

    • Pijama Wearing Ninja says:

      This will help me eventually, although I haven’t really noticed this with girls, unless they’re high-school girls and while senior high-school girls are good looking, their parochialism and immaturity bore me. I simply don’t buy your frame though. What’s wrong with partying if you’re 27? Just because you’re not 21, it doesn’t mean you can’t party anymore.

      You can learn things young girls like too. Take ballroom dance classes, learn to ride a horse and similar activities and you won’t have a problem. Occasional partying isn’t a problem either, although spending 5 straight days on cocaine and MDMA isn’t really an option anymore. So the stages of life thing isn’t an issue of what young girls like to do, although I do agree that it can be an issue.

    • Zombie Shane says:

      There is one and only one reason to become exclusive: BECAUSE SHE’S YOUR WIFE.

      BECAUSE SHE IS CARRYING YOUR OFFSPRING IN HER WOMB.

      Children. Family. Heirs. Progeny.

      That’s where it’s at.

      If she ain’t ready to start pushing out your babies, then you have no business being in a “long term relationship” with her.

      Move on and find a bitch who does want to have your babies.

      Or up your game so that 20-year-old whores will want to have your babies.

    • mcg says:

      “So, my question is this: Should you refrain from becoming exclusive with young girls?”

      If she is in a “different stage” than you, then go your own way. Stop being a beta. Take her if she allows it. Enjoy the ride.

    • thrust says:

      That, in a nutshell, was why my ex (21) and me (27) split.

    • haunted trilobite says:

      “But, especially with younger women they want to be (and probably should be) partying and doing college things”. Yeah, probably should be drinking til their ovaries cyst over, getting tatted up and keeping their mouths, asses and pussies agape for so many men they lose count of their ‘whirlwind romances’. Once they get it all out of their system, they can take pride in their hardened hearts, smokers’ hag cackle and IVF baby they bequeath their herpes to.

  11. single40NewToPUA says:

    I just came back from a POF date. Her profile pictures were pleasant enough but when we met in person and she opened her mouth, I saw British-style teeth and her thick accent was far too distracting.

    I usually try to give women a chance but this was not going to work. She is very blue collar in terms of speech and mannerisms. I imagine a guy who us a plumber or a truck driver might have a great time with her.

    I couldn’t stop thinking of my pretty girlfriend. I tried to call her, but no answer.

    I’ll move on to the next girl.

  12. walawala says:

    Email #3 way too much investment. My text game is now much tighter. Krauser’s book “Daygame Mastery” has a simple template that works.

    But more importantly the whole “What’s you favorite shape?” sounds like a pua routine.

    I had a question. I was gaming a girl in my social circle last night. It was going well, she’s responding to game, giving me IOI’s… I DHV’d her and said there was an event Sunday and she come out. She was mildly interested but intrigued: “I’ll try…” something like this…polite but non-committal.

    So I told her I’d get her number before I left because I didn’t have my phone with me at that moment we were dancing and chatting…I was holding her hand and staring into her eyes as a I said this and her reaction was interesting. Her eyes suddenly widened, she paused, smiled and said ok someone confused. I took this to mean her hamster had been suddenly stoked.

    But as I was leaving she was surrounded by orbiters and friends so I didn’t get a chance to scoop her number or even say goodbye.

    I will see her again out and about again. Any feedback or thoughts on this scenario?

    • Kate says:

      “But as I was leaving she was surrounded by orbiters and friends so I didn’t get a chance to scoop her number or even say goodbye.”

      Use the “Prince hand” to pull her out of the group next time.

    • thrust says:

      wala – I’m going through the yareallyarchive and reading the discussion you guys had on the break-up of your LTR. Do you know the exact date you started to transcribe what was going down/made her break up with you. Was it October 2013?

      • walawala says:

        It happened Mid-October. The way she broke up was classic “Cluster B”—not only did she end things suddenly after an argument but she also blew off not coming to a hugely important event that she knew was important to me and that she had helped plan. It was crushing. I kept my crap together, no one in my social circle knew or knows there was a problem…but she and I both know.

        YaReally was awesome in dissecting it and pretty much nailed it. I handled it perfectly off the top, then fell off the wagon and called her back after one of her series of outreaches. Then she pulled away. I went no contact/NEXTED her again….she came out to my New Year’s Eve Party…we started texting and she suggested we meet up and hang out. Then suddenly she canceled on some premise that she was in “trouble”…I went away on a long holiday. She apparently got separation anxiety and called/texted/Facebooked 20 times asking how I was. I finally did reply. She said she wanted to be “Friends”—bizarre. I said no, I saw her as a woman and after what she did we could never be friends. Then I caught her in a lie and called her out on it sending her a FB photo of her at a party the day after she told me she was too “stressed” to meet up with me.

        That was 3 months ago. Since then I’ve held to No Contact, started banging another girl and gaming other new girls. The ex still comes out. I blank her. Just last night she started hovering around where me and my friends were sitting and she took a flyer for another event I was organizing.

        I suspect there will be another outreach to book a place at this event in an attempt to “hoover” me back in so she can get her attention fix.

        I don’t know your situation but…YaReally’s read and advice were spot on. I’m now doing great. I now understand she has “Cluster B” traits and her constant lying, manipulation etc could only be managed by my tight game. But as YaReally has pointed out, I could get her back anytime BUT…it would be on her terms not mine. So…I’ve learned a lot.

        Anything you’re looking for specifically? There is a lot of coaching on the “Soft Next”.

  13. ignissblog says:

    In the question #3, writing the “You seem cool” and its followup would have benefited greatly from lack of interpunction. With two or three separate sentences, it comes accross as “You seem cool. … … Er, do you want to go out”.
    Instead, go for “You seem cool wanna hang out this weekend” or something.

    • Zombie Shane says:

      > “wanna”

      Lose the “wanna”.

      ALPHAS DO NOT ASK.

      ALPHAS ORDER.

      “You seem kinda cool – we will be at __________ after 11PM and you could join us if you wore something sexy. But no Mom jeans. And leave that Orca friend of yours at home. None of my homeboyz are gonna wanna hit on that whale blubber. Sorry.”

      • mcg says:

        “ALPHAS DO NOT ASK. ALPHAS ORDER.”

        Lay off the man sauce. We get it already.

        • Gro Haila says:

          Repetitio est mater studiorum

          • Zombie Shane says:

            Some of the younger guys here still don’t realize how indecisive women really are.

            I know plenty of women who can’t be entrusted to deliver a firm, positive, forthright answer to the question “Which restaurant would you like to go to tonight?”

            My guess is that the younger guys are still in that stage where they just assume [probably without ever even realizing that they have assumed] that gals are just like guys and that gals always know exactly what they want just like guys always know exactly what they want.

            Which is such a horribly awful backwards upsidedown idiotic assumption to be making about the state of affairs between men and women.

            [Even though you never even realize that you have made the assumption.]

            You’ll get to the prize so much sooner in life once you realize that women WANT to be told what to do – they WANT someone else to make their decisions for them.

            Hell, they even want you to make the most important decisions of all for them: “Yes we are going to make love. No you are not going to use birth control.”

            That sort of thing.

  14. PD says:

    #4 needs a guitar and a band, however awful they may be. For some reason tons of rock musicians from local dive bars to the massive arenas seem to have a baby face or girlish features and be too thin, but it never seems to hurt their notch count.

    Just look at Prince.

    If he can’t play already, no need to spend 12 hours a day for 10 years becoming Steve Vai, just figure out 3 or 4 power chords and make cheesy punk, shouldn’t take more than a couple months to get good enough to start jamming and get something going. Drop D’s even easier/faster.

  15. Mistral says:

    “Backstage passes. Shows. Artsy house parties. Introductions to movers and shakers. Cultural or urban nooks and crannies to which only older men can give her access.”

    Your breakdown on Text Game (Email #3), didn’t come soon enough for James Franco, who shows some Incredibly Weak text game chasing what turned out to be a 17 y.o. girl. One can only hope he’s pranking us, but his text game reads like a Cry For (red pill) Help.

    Dewd gave her the social validation she craved, and is now in damage control mode:

    http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/gossip/la-et-mg-james-franco-teenager-instagram-lucy-clode-20140403,0,4544236.story#axzz2xzjUQRwb

  16. Paideia says:

    Question:

    Let’s say you had a run of dates with a girl, solid 9, old-fashioned morals, etc. (basically non-existent in the West), where things went well, or seemed to, but then the attraction died out before the deal was sealed. Your latest invite was rejected (under the guise of some other excuse about work). Your response to her lame excuse is “lol ok” to which she responded and you never answered.

    You’re friends on Facebook, and four months later it’s her birthday. Would you write “happy birthday” in order to sound whether you it’s worth another shot?

    On the one hand, one should always discard forever hands that weren’t well played. On the other, the cost to dignity at that stage is low, because you’ve waited four months, didn’t respond, and you’re writing something non-committal, but sincere.

    This begs the question, why the fuck bother? The answer is that she’s really, really cute.

    • Zombie Shane says:

      > “but then the attraction died out before the deal was sealed”

      MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE.

      Find another HB9.

      And then if HB9 #1 ever sees you out in public with HB9 #2 on your arm, then the attraction will heat back up again.

      But never dwell on the past [except to learn from your mistakes, and to swear to yourself that you will never repeat them].

      A True Alpha is always concentrating on the future.

      • Ovid says:

        Zomb,

        http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2014/04/03/studies-provide-support-for-dread-game/#comment-547444

        “I’ve crossed paths with the hardcore “swinging” crowd before, and it’s not pretty, man.Those fuckers are evil incarnate”

        Care to enlarge on that for us? I know some couple I suspect are swingers and would like to learn more.

      • Tilikum says:

        riiiiiight. the archer misses the target and instead of fixing his shit and unfucking himself he just goes wasting arrows at other targets he cant hit.

        lol. i’m starting to get your whole tradcon moralist vibe now dude. i’d be angry too lol

        • Zombie Shane says:

          He had his shot, but he blew it.

          She figured him to be beta or boring or creepy or whatever.

          To undo that mis-impression* would require an insane amount of work.

          Better to work on his Game so that the next time he has a good shot with an HB9, he doesn’t get dismissed as beta or boring or creepy or whatever.

          Learn from your mistakes.

          Move on.

          PS: Alphas do NOT sit around for four months thinking about the one who got away.

          Alphas move on to the next prey.

          Always on the move.

          *PPS: Hopefully it was a mis-impression. Hopefully she didn’t size him up accurately.

          • Scray says:

            ‘Alphas do NOT sit around for four months thinking about the one who got away.’

            Alphas have several plates, almost-plates, and could-be plates spinning though. It’s not like he has to spend much time thinking about her. Just shoot a text here and there, see if she bites. Very easy to do this while chasing other puss.

          • Tilikum says:

            i do what interests me. sometimes its reviving an old conquest.

    • Tilikum says:

      contact and get sexual quickly. like 3rd text.

      she got bored cause you failed to treat her as a sexual being. you got an uphill battle dude. quit doing that shit.

      • Paideia says:

        I know all that stuff about concentrating on the future. Relax.

        We made out several times, but I never got the impression she was ready to get fucked.

        I will contact around bday and see how she responds. Meanwhile I will continue to bang sluts and do work.

        • Tilikum says:

          future?

          dont fuck up anymore was my advice.

          i get bored so my latest experiment is meet-fuck-get em to fall in love-skate- get em back.

          keeps me from chewing on a barrel.

          search DENNIS method on youtube.

    • Kate says:

      Don’t do it. If she hasn’t contacted you in four months, she does NOT get a happy birthday message. If you want to try again with her, do it at another time when the world won’t be revolving around her.

    • walawala says:

      You have oneitis. Ignore her. NOT sending her anything on her birthday would send a stronger message.

      From what you say, you never escalated and this string of “dates” was you giving her attention and not understanding how to seduce a girl.

      Get Krauser’s book Daygame Mastery…read it cover to cover, then go out and start gaming girls properly.

      No more string of dates….learn how to escalate. If you don’t/can’t it’s not on.

    • Scray says:

      ‘old-fashioned morals’

      Lol. Nah. She probably just tricked you with that prim and proper act, then…when you fell for it, the ‘attraction’ died down because you started treating her like a little princess.

      ‘Your response to her lame excuse is “lol ok” to which she responded and you never answered.’

      Huge mistake. Women will flake on you for a ton of reasons. Just keep them in the txt rotation. They’ll come around. Two words that the player has to live by: be cool.

      ‘Would you write “happy birthday” in order to sound whether you it’s worth another shot?’

      Also gay. Don’t ever write shit on a bitch’s wall. PM her happy birthday then ask her to hang out/catch up.

  17. datbro says:

    RE: Tinder guy

    Yes, not great game but it wouldn’t have mattered from the beginning. Her very first responses were way too cold for it to be worth the effort. NEXT right at “wat.” He was in a Sisyphean uphill battle from the jump. No point in wasting time on a Tinder girl who doesn’t even want to give you a chance to begin with. Better game would have just led to more wasted time and a flake later on.

  18. Anon says:

    The mighty patriarchal Muzz women get bernankified too.

    Behold, The Muslim Mudsharks

  19. Vicus says:

    for all of you with Abundance Mentality and eyes to see, check this Hottest and Sexiest Women By Country map:

    http://www.targetmap.com/viewer.aspx?reportId=32066

  20. tang3zang says:

    Doing that at a school these days would probably get the guy fired though. I had a math teacher in high school 5 years back who did exactly what you suggested, except he dropped a heavy textbook on this kid’s desk to get him to pay attention. He had to explain himself to the school committee before coming back and giving an apology filled with PC buzzwords, not hurting kid’s self-esteem, and such.

  21. Libertardian says:

    Got an ebola outbreak? Attack the volunteer treatment center, as that must be where it came from.

    http://news.nationalpost.com/2014/04/05/angry-crowd-attacks-ebola-treatment-centre-in-guinea-accuses-them-of-causing-the-disease/

    • Libertardian says:

      Re: the tweet “Poor guy should’ve read Derb’s “The Talk””

      Civilization and savagery do not mix. Do you get it yet, libs? Sure you do. That’s why your creed is “diversity for thee, not for me.” Of course, if this guy had driven away, he’d be facing hit-and-run and hate crime charges and the MSM would eagerly make the kid into the new Trayvon Martin. You can bet your last cent that same article would not be rhetorically asking “Was it a hate crime?”

      ‘Detroit Police Sgt. Michael Woody said Steven Utash was not at fault for the accident.

      “Our preliminary investigation shows the child stepped in front of his vehicle,” Woody said. “He did exactly the right thing. He stopped his vehicle, he got out and he tried to render aid to a small child. He did exactly what he was supposed to do… It was a small child and it was an accident; is what it was.”’

      “Doing the right thing” in any area of modern Amerikan life is like going bugchasing at the local prison. “Doing the right thing” will make you a castrated beta male who enjoys the soul cancer of endless friendzoning followed by a frivorce industry ass-raping. “Doing the right thing” will land you in a cubicle to work at least three and a half months every year solely to finance “performance bonuses” for unindicted white collar criminals and gimmedats for people who want you and your family violently dead. That is, if you’re not fired for being silly enough to imagine the first amendment still applies to a racist, rapist, capitalist oppressor like yourself.

    • thwack says:

      is that where the white people are?

  22. al says:

    Sometimes the people on the ground kBill Gates’ Polio Vaccine Program Eradicates Children, Not Polio

    by Christina EnglandNovember 26 2013

    In the depths of cyberspace lurks a press release written by the CDC, confirming that the OPV, or oral polio vaccination, given to millions of children throughout the developing world, is causing them to develop vaccine-induced polio. Instead of banning the vaccination, as one would expect, the CDC has decided in its wisdom that the best way to tackle the problem is to maintain a high rate of vaccination in all countries!

    Yes, that is correct. The CDC recommends maintaining a high rate of vaccination, vaccinating as many children as possible with a vaccine that causes polio.

    The CDC Spills The Beans
    In 2012, the CDC wrote a press release titled Update on Vaccine-Derived Polioviruses — Worldwide, April 2011–June 2012. They wrote:

    “In 1988, the World Health Assembly resolved to eradicate poliomyelitis worldwide. One of the main tools used in polio eradication efforts has been the live, attenuated oral poliovirus vaccine (OPV). This inexpensive vaccine is administered easily by mouth, makes recent recipients resistant to infection by wild polioviruses (WPVs), and provides long-term protection against paralytic disease through durable humoral immunity. Nonetheless, rare cases of vaccine-associated paralytic poliomyelitis can occur both among immunologically normal OPV recipients and their contacts and among persons who are immunodeficient. In addition, vaccine-derived polioviruses (VDPVs) can emerge to cause polio outbreaks in areas with low OPV coverage and can replicate for years in persons who are immunodeficient.” (emphasis added)

    They continued:

    “VDPVs can cause paralytic polio in humans and have the potential for sustained circulation. VDPVs resemble WPVs biologically and differ from most vaccine-related poliovirus (VRPV) isolates by having genetic properties consistent with prolonged replication or transmission. VDPVs were first identified by sequence analyses of poliovirus isolates.” (emphasis added)

    The CDC recommended that the best way to deal with this problem is mass vaccination. They stated:

    “To prevent VDPV emergence and spread, all countries should maintain high vaccination coverage against all three poliovirus serotypes.” [1]

    Immunodeficiency disorders occur when the body’s immune response is reduced or absent. In other words, governments worldwide are actively promoting a vaccine that they know will cause millions of vulnerable, sick and immunodeficient children to develop vaccine-induced polio. [2]

    Billy Goes To Bollywood

    In order for governments to mass vaccinate more efficiently, they are fully backing the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, a group that has made it very clear that their aim is to wipe out wild polio from the planet. The Gates Foundation appears to be ignorant of the fact that they are causing tens of thousands of children to suffer from vaccine-induced polio.

    In the meantime, the rates of vaccine-induced polio go through the roof.

    The Rates Of Vaccine-Induced Polio Soar
    In 2010, the Polio Global Eradication Initiative, founded in 1988 by the World Health Organization, Rotary International, UNICEF, and the US CDC stated that there were only 42 cases of wild polio reported in India.

    This all sounds extremely impressive, until we learn that public health experts estimate that between 100 and 180 children in India develop vaccine-associated polio paralysis (VAPP) every year.

    The Activist Post stated that:

    “In 2005, it was reported that children in a small village in the United States had contracted vaccine-derived polio. In Nigeria, >70 cases have been reported. In 2006, 1600 cases of vaccine-induced polio occurred in India, according to the Indian Medical Association Sub-Committee on Immunisation’s report on the Polio Eradication Initiative. The point to be noted is that these cases were reported during repeated mass-immunization campaigns in which repeated doses of OPV were administered. In 2008, many cases of polio were reported in all provinces of Pakistan, where OPV is used for repeated mass-immunization campaigns.” (emphasis added) [6]
    t the number of children now suffering from vaccine-induced polio has reached epic proportions.

    A paper written by Neetu Vashishi and Jacob Puliyel published in the Medical Journal of Medical Ethics recently stated that:

    “… while India has been polio-free for a year, there has been a huge increase in non-polio acute flaccid paralysis (NPAFP). In 2011, there were an extra 47,500 new cases of NPAFP. Clinically indistinguishable from polio paralysis but twice as deadly, the incidence of NPAFP was directly proportional to doses of oral polio received.
    Conclusion
    With numbers of this size being reported about vaccine-induced polio, you would think that someone, somewhere, would have tried to stop the devastation. However, instead of stopping the vaccination program and trying to rein in Bill Gates, it appears that governments worldwide have given Gates the green light to do exactly what he wants.

    This is not eradication of polio; this is eradication of the children of India, plain and simple. For eradication of a disease to be effective, you do not replace one disease for another; you must have disease-free, healthy children. In my opinion this is nothing more than another elaborate vaccination hoax and it needs to be stopped.now better than you ……….

  23. jimmy says:

    #3 What’s your favorite shape?
    ‘Hmm, a star because it has a lot more to it, than other shapes’

    Subtle subtext jab surely.
    Read – I like interesting and multifaceted guys unlike the writer of the text (other shapes) whom seems boring and limited.

  24. Suburban_elk says:

    Good emails this week sir.

    In regards email 2, the 25-year old having to back down teenaged troublemakers. It is simply true that a good number of men can not beat down 13-year olds toughs. A friend was a high school varsity athlete tells me that some of the 12-year olds in Little League are six feet tall and two hundred pounds, and yeah mostly blacks. Realistically those kids have more muscle power and higher T than many an aspiring respectable white guy. Everyone is not Howie Long or hardscrabble farmer. What advice is appropriate for that situation i don’t know; teachers have no actual authority in this day and age it is a jungle and the legal system and the rest of public opinion would sacrifice a white teacher. They don’t get to carry and just the consideration of that illustrates the absurdity. Asking some swapple to be the boss of stranger kids? without giving him liscense to kill forget about it.

    The advice to email 4 is good: a big theme there: women becoming more masculine as men more feminine. A man with a strong arm can have a soft face and the un aggressive character that goes with it, and women respond to that without fear and even condescending presumption. He has do what he can to be for real. Shooting bears? or at least being willing to cause harm. A commenter on a thread here the other week wrote of Al Capone not having a strong face (relative to that time), but he was respected and dreadful. Consciousless sociopathy is the answer to no one’s problems, but his example makes the point of what willpower can do.

  25. sunshinemary says:

    Email 1 – Just to clarify, the list was not compiled by ME, rather it is from a book written by two Christian women. The topic of the book is why books like Fifty Shades of Grey are damaging to women. The book is pretty good, but I would probably quibble a bit with their list of what women want, or at least add (as CH sort of did) the words “by a man she finds attractive” to each one.

  26. Grim says:

    Perfect example of a YKW Gen X mother. First child at 34 and another at 37.

    Drowned them in the bathtub.

    http://www.miamiherald.com/2014/04/05/4041547/6-year-old-boy-in-drowning-case.html

  27. zenith says:

    SNL just dropped a long overdue reality bomb,

  28. walawala says:

    A few easy corrections for #3

    “Still up to hang out tonight?” This gives her too much power to say no

    BETTER:

    You: “if you behave, we’ll go for drinks….”

    WAIT FOR HER RESPONSE

    You: “Tonight works for me….”

    then of course there’s the go-to response:

    Her: I’m a vegan…blah blah blah

    You: “vegan? gay.”

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