Email #1: “Steve” sincerely asks,
Important question:
Can sluts fall in love?
Absolutely. But they can also fall out of love. And they do both more easily than non-sluts.
Sluts are a strange amalgam of genetic, environmental, and “gray area” influences. Hormones are a good example of a gray area somewhere between the environment and genes which shapes character. While I’ve no hard evidence, I’d bet that sluts release less oxytocin than normal women do during lovemaking, which means the hard slut is less likely to emotionally bond when she’s spermally bonded.
******
Email #2: A reader has a question about needy ex-girlfriends.
My question is regarding ‘the rules of contact with your ex after a breakup’.
My gf and I recently split after 1 year (her idea) due to her feeling that our relationship had run its course and wasn’t going to progress. Despite the fact that I disagreed, I had no choice but to respect her wishes and let her go. I’m back to my single-guy-Alpha ways but she continues to contact me from time to time (weeknight texts ‘just thinking about you and wanted to say hi’ or late Sat night “we just got our hair done up for the night!”)
What in the fuck is one supposed to do w that? Half of my friends who I trust for counsel think I should refrain from replying or contacting her and just move on, re-fill my bullpen, etc. The other half are advising that I continue to pursue her, text w her, try to be around her, treat her like a human/friend etc. I’m curious what your experiences have taught you in similar situations.
Any kind of unsolicited contact from an ex-girlfriend, no matter how trivial or weird, is proof that she still has feelings for you. This sounds like a break-up she never really wanted, but considered a last ditch effort to bring you to heel. Or it was prodded by subterfuge from her jealous girl friends.
(When a girl breaks up after falling out of love, you will rarely, if ever, hear from her again unless necessity dictates.)
Whatever advice you’re getting, it’s nothing compared to the knowledge that you are sitting in the driver’s seat. You have hand. Lots of it. Use it like an acromegalic pimp.
She wants the lines of communication open, because she still has hope you’ll give her what she needs. Reply, but only a fraction of the time she texts. Initially, keep it friendly and frivolous, but don’t allow yourself to get boxed into a “friends forever?” interrogation. If she starts down that road, first, know she doesn’t really mean it, and second, amputate that rotten limb of conversation promptly. “You’re so funny” is a reply that will light a fire under her hamster’s ass. Anytime she sends you one of those “just thinking about you” texts, reply “aw that’s sweet.” If she texts, “just got our hair done”, reply, “thanks! i needed to know this.”
The idea is that you are reinforcing your relative higher value by repeatedly and (some would say) sadistically mocking her eagerness to keep you in her life.
Allow for a few weeks of this empty banter, then maneuver her into your fornication zone with a disarming suggestion: “If you need to talk, you can swing by tomorrow (tonight’s no good)”. Through the expert deployment of ambiguous promises, you want her to believe you are warming to the idea of a committed, conventional long-term relationship. The goal is increasing perceptions of your “commitment attainability”, and that will require some feints to the beta side. Convinced of your good intentions, you can extract sexual goodies in this manner for another six months or so, before the process begins anew.
******
Email #3: “Chris” writes,
You’ve changed my life massively for the better, but now I’m not sure how to handle a girl I actually want.
She’s involved in the stuff I like (strength sports) and is overtly sexual, so she was off to a good start. I chose to ignore a personal red flag (she trains horses). I set up for us to go somewhere fun and eat after, but the morning of, she cancels on me. I responded along the lines of that’s fine, but next time she has to make the plans, and so I gave up and deleted her contact info.
Never say “that’s fine” when a girl flakes at the last minute. That’s rewarding bad behavior. “lol” would have been a far superior response.
Knowing how these things work, I checked tinder and saw she was active right before that, most likely made plans with someone of higher status.
Your inner game is weak. You’re making a lot of assumptions that, even if they were proved true, do you no good to dwell on.
I DO actually like her and would like to, at the very least, bed someone who commonly complains on twitter that most guys aren’t man enough for her.
Any girls who “””brags””” in this way on a social media platform is very insecure about her ability to land an alpha male, and LOVES assholes. I can already tell by the jive of your email that you’re a niceguy, and that won’t do for girls of her nature. You need to turn your dick dial to “bring da movies“.
Should I write her off entirely and forget it since attractive 19 year olds are plentiful anyway? Or is there a decent way back in? My birthday is soon if that would afford an opportunity, though anything to do with that seems too friendly to restart on.
Birthday smirthday. You think a girl you aren’t fucking cares about your birthday? Turn hard dick on her, swirl her mental fallopian grooves, and marinate for a while. Right now, she’s dreaming a rough rider will saddle up and shove her face in the hay.
******
Email #4: “Andrew” (not WK) is lost in a land of maneaters.
How do you differentiate between genuine interest and her showing interest in hopes of your attention/making you an orbiter?
Do you ever flirt about sex with her? If not, she sees you as Castrate the friendly ghost.
A girl I met a couple months ago has been showing a pretty solid amount of interest lately. Touches me, punches me when I tease, calls me cute, plays with my hair, etc. I follow everything in your blog, I follow a lot of Rollo’s advice, Roosh, etc. The reason I’m asking is, she’ll initiate a text, I’ll reply with something relevant, and she will reply hours later, but usually she never replies at all. This has happened about 3 times now and since then I’ve completely avoided texting to minimize the risk of desperation ruining my shit in person.
Beta bait. She’s threw out the chum (her texts), you replied on cue (and with relevancy no less!), she released you back to the ocean of dullboys.
Do you have a website you check when you’re bored, just to see if there is anything new? And when there isn’t, you just exit? I feel like I’m her “website”. She texts me, finds nothing interesting, and doesn’t respond. She trying to make me an orbiter or something?
She’s probably fishing for a reason to be attracted to you, but all she’s pulling up are old tires. This sounds less like a beta orbiter invitation than a girl who began sexually curious but suffered a dearth of confirmatory evidence. You can bet other guys are in her life, which drives down the value of your communication. You’re in sort of a limbo; not a love interest, not a desexualized beta buddy. Like the emailer above, I think you need to go the Full Asshole to reinvigorate her waning interest.
******
Email #5: “Christian”, a reader with some fame cred asks,
Love the site. I check it every day. Opened my eyes to game and the red pill mentality. Thank you x10000000
Anyways, I have a job in media where I am in the public light. Small market gig but I’m on TV here and some people recognize me when I go out. I want to know your thoughts on how that could change my options when it comes to getting laid.
It’ll increase them. That’ll be $300.
I tend to avoid online dating sites for these reasons (don’t want to be recognized). I also tend to avoid bringing up my career w girls i meet unless asked.
This is a smart ploy. Fame’s pull on women is most powerful when it’s discovered rather than disclosed. Plus, you’ll have a particular need to filter out golddiggers. Fame is so powerful a tingle generator it’s best to be faux embarrassed about it.
I feel like my career is holding me back from achieving the life I want w women. I’m insecure about being recognized.
Being recognized is not your problem. Managing post-coital expectations is your problem.
I relish when I’m out of town and gaming chicks because I can be as free w my words and actions without that fear.
Any words of advice for those that have similar issues?
A lot of male public figures have mistresses and active sex lives. Yet you only hear about a small percentage of them blowing up the media each year. How do the rest manage their harems? Most women are so thrilled to be with a famous guy they’ll be very careful about rocking the boat. If this is your quandary, you’ll need to be more forcefully up front about what you expect from women, and what they can expect from you. Allowing drama to flourish just for the fun of it is a luxury you may not be able to afford.
If you want girls to “love you for who you are” instead of for the fame, well, the platitude princess can help you with that. She leaves quarters under pillows!
******
Email #6: Austin uncovers a new, potent form of shit test.
I’ve got a question about some game. I feel like recently I’ve come across a (potential) shit test that I’m not familiar with, it usually goes something like
Her: You remind me of my ex boyfriend (playfully)
I like to go bold here
Me: So you’re saying I’m extremely handsome
usually puts them a little off or they pick some other quality, but I’m not sure where to go from here, thanks Gents
Context is crucial. If this shit test is delivered playfully, it means “oh no I’m falling for one of these guys again”. Your reply was OK, nothing really self-sabotaging about it, but I would have said something else. (It would feel a little gay to compliment a girl’s ex on his looks, however indirectly.) Where you go from there depends on her reaction. If she picks another quality, tell her you feel objectified, and (with a hammy smile) inform her that her flirting is horrible, and she needs to step up her game for a special snowflake like yourself.
The only real concern you should have with passing shit tests is, well, passing them. You don’t have to smash it to smithereens. A “D” is a passing grade. All you need to do is avoid getting defensive or overly emotionally engaged — e.g., “I remind you of your ex?! How so??” — and you’ll be fine.
[crypto-donation-box]
